Category Archives: Life at the Lambdins

October 10, 2011 · 4:11 pm

So much to say….so little time to say it!

So many things I want to write about and yet life continues to be a whirlwind of activity.  So this is just a random crazy rambling that contains many of my “all over the place” things I want to share with each of you. So grab a pumpkin spice latte my friend and let’s share some time together.

Life is often just a matter of perspective

Have you ever noticed that when you are gaining unwanted weight…the number on the scale in the morning makes you crazy, mad or depressed! And yet when you are losing weight …that exact same number is a cause for rejoicing?

Thinking we should realize that through all life’s twists and turns (or ups and downs like the scale) we should keep it all in perspective…just down the road a piece what we see now as maddening or depressing could look pretty darn good!

“Danielism’s”

My four year old son gives me enough “material” to write about daily as well as saying the “darndest” & cutest things on a regular basis!

There was a major chemical plant fire in my #2 daughter, Amy’s college town of Waxahachie, Texas. Daniel while watching the live feed of the fire says: “I hope Amy doesn’t get fired!”  Then looking quite stressed out he continues with intensity…”I need to tell Daddy about this!” (I respond – “Daniel…Daddy is in Texas  with Amy!”) Daniel jumps off the bed and says “Oh good then Amy won’t get blown up”…and he runs off to play without giving it another thought.

Don’t you just love it that he thinks his Daddy can take care of it all just like any superhero?! (hmmmm…perhaps we should become like a kid with our heavenly Daddy and rest in the fact that He’s got it covered!)

Communication Breakdown

In this day and age where we have multiple amazing avenues of communication….why did I have to call my daughter in Texas to have her send a facebook message to my next door neighbor to ask her to knock on my back door and tell my family to please call me because I was stranded on the side of the highway in the pouring down rain an hour away from home?

Why? Because after calling the house phone (which apparently they could not find…curse those cordless phones that are not attached to the wall…some technology really has not helped us) and my husband’s cell phone (which he apparently left in the car…why even  have a cell phone if it is not with you?) multiple times (read here 20 times each phone) I finally got creative and figured out a way to personally deliver a message to my family when it really was an actual emergency!

Next time I am traveling with a carrier pigeon…

Movies – When it Rains it Pours

Typically before the monthly “date night” with my love….I do a “once over” on the movie review page and decide there is nothing playing worth wasting my valuable time or my limited resources.  But lately there as been an abundance of really GREAT movies! (and not enough date nights!)

The Help — ummmmmm loved this movie! Funny, Moving, Passionate, Angering, Endearing, Inspiring…. So many “take aways” that could be life changing for you.  While most of us who saw the movie shared our outrage over the treatment of those of a different race or ethnicity I wonder if we realize how many of us think of others who are not of a certain “class” (be it educational, social, financial, religious or even racial) as lower than we are.  Even if we are not overtly treating them as “second class” citizens…our thinking is probably coming out in some of our actions no matter how small.  What would happen if we got as disgusted with ourselves as we did with the racist characters in this movie and changed even our thinking about those who somehow we view as “below” us?  Something to think about….

Courageous  – If you are a Dad….if you have had a Dad….if you have ever wanted a Dad – that is right everyone of us needs to see this inspirational  action packed movie about failure, fear, faith and fathering.  Bring a pack of kleenex because you will cry! You will also be convicted!  And hopefully you will be challenged and changed. It is currently #6 in the box office after two weekends running…GO SEE IT!

Seven Days In Utopia  – first it is rated G….love that! Although it is about golf (not my favorite subject) this movie is more about forgiveness and mercy and grace.  Love it when I can go to a movie and leave with great life lessons learned and positive messages. (reminds me of The Ultimate Gift…another GREAT movie!)  It has been out over a month so if you don’t catch it at the theater be sure to look for it when it comes out on DVD.

 

Machine Gun Preacher – so I haven’t seen it yet and there are probably many things that will irritate & greatly offend me about this movie (mostly the excessive foul language)…I am pretty sure I will go see it!  Why?  Because I love the fact that it is exposing the atrocities of how children are being horrifically treated in Sudan and perhaps it will ignite some “righteous justice” in those of us who are content to sip our lattes in Starbucks while simply talking about the injustices in the world but never getting off our fannies to actually do anything about it.  My college age daughters have both already seen it because they live in our near BIG cities where it has already opened. Besides it’s a great couple movie as it has lots of guns & violence for the guys and the emotional tug of precious children being rescued for the gals. (PS – No I won’t let my children see this one)

 

Marital Bliss

Speaking of date nights…lately I have found myself sharing tidbits of advice to couples who are committed to their marriages but find themselves struggling with different challenges. (not too mention the fact that the all time number one blog post visited on my blog deals with overcoming marital problems…it must be something we all need help with)

One of the things we often do on our date nights when we are having fun, at peace and enjoying our relationship (in other words not in the middle of a disagreement or intense conversation) is to ask each other this – “What is one thing I can change or do better that would really be a blessing to you?”   The rules are –> it can only be ONE thing (we can all handle tackling one issue at a time), that I won’t argue about it and that I will make an honest attempt to change or do what is asked.

You need an example? Ok….so usually my sweet husband answers with…”hmmmm (then a pause to think), no I’m good Beth, I can’t think of anything. (HA!  I know all too well how hard I am to live with…he is just a wee bit easy going. And of course I always have something that he can do or change that would bless me)  But a few years ago he did come up with something.  He shared with me that it would really bless him if I would be on time for church. (according to his idea of “on time” – 10 minutes early…not my idea of “on time” – right at the starting time and up to 10 minutes late)  So even though I was comfortable in “my way” of doing things and I didn’t really see the big deal…I agreed to do this because it was a big deal to him.  And because I love him I am willing to change and I want to bless him!

That is just one small example of something that can really help you on your road to marital bliss! So next time you are out on a date night (you are going on date nights right?)…make this one sentence a part of your wonderful evening.

Oh where in the world is Virginia Elizabeth?

In case you missed the reference to “Oh where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?” (and you would if you were not a kid or raising kids in the 90’s or early ‘oos) OR you have no idea who Virginia Elizabeth is…the comment is from an educational video game & television series exploring geography & history.  And since “Oh where in the world is Beth“….doesn’t have the same ring or pizzaz as Carmen Sandiego…I used my given name…Virginia Elizabeth (fancy huh?)  Did you know that my real name is Virginia and I actually go by a nickname of my middle name. Strange huh?  Even my own dear mother can not explain why they did this…and it has definitely been a challenge in a day and age where identity is so crucial. As a result I have named my children exactly what I have called them, without even nicknames.  It has also been humourous at times having several “real” names….but I digress. What I really wanted to tell you is that I have been traveling or going on out of town excursions A LOT in the last six weeks!

  • from the beach in Santa Cruz, CA with dear friends
  • to Waxahachie, Texas where my second daughter has begun her freshman year of college at SAGU
  • to Lorton, Virginia to spend time with and help my mother out while she has been experiencing some challenging health issues (bonus: my Micehelle took the bus down from NYC to see me and celebrate her 22nd birthday!)
  • to our annual Apple Hill fall family day trip…love this! (you can read about this tradition here)
  • and finally I just returned yesterday from my 16th Croptoberfest Retreat weekend in Toulomne, CA with close to 100 women who were happily relaxing, scrapbooking, eating & enjoying time away from it all with dear friends.
  • Oh wait….I also have driven to the Oakland airport & back six times in the past month as my family has been doing their fair share of traveling as well  (and last week the car I was driving lost its transmission on the way home and I got a lift back home from the tow truck driver…that was a first)

If you love pictures & want to see more of my last six weeks in full living color…click here! I am officially home for the next three weeks until I fly off again for a combo 16th birthday/college visitation/time with Michelle trip to NYC & Boston in November.

Inspire Ministries….am I speaking & writing?

Hmmmmm….a year ago I announced that the Lord was moving me in a direction of beginning a ministry that would involve using my gifts and talents in speaking & writing to inspire people to live a life of purpose, passion & praise.

Soooooooo….have I been doing that? 

Well the writing is sporadic with a constant nagging in my mind that I need to “get on it”.  And yet here I am not even consistently blogging, let alone actually working on a manuscript. Yes I am “busy” (HATE that word).  Yes, I have 8 children to care for. Yes, there are a dozen legitimate excuses.  And yet excuses are just that excuses for not doing what you say you want to do.  If we really want to do something, we will do it. Period. End of story.  Which means what I need to say is that it is just not my priority (not important enough to me at this time).  Admitting the truth is often the first step to change…we will see if I change.

Speaking…I have “officially” had 6 speaking engagements this past year. (and 2 additional invitations that I had to pass on due to conflicts)   They have ranged from women’s luncheons to retreats to conferences.  They have all gone well with the Lord using me to speak His words of life through sharing my life stories and insights.  I love it!  My goal was 6 this past year and 12 this coming year.  The problem with speaking (unlike writing) is that you have to be invited to do it.  So after a good first year start I am staring at an empty calendar except for a lone Moms Fellowship Group in January.  Now I do a lot of “one on one” speaking assignments and I simply love these too! (could these be called counseling or life coaching?  Funny, I find myself often saying the same things I say in a group setting with just a bit more personalization)

Perhaps you or someone you know is looking for a speaker for their event, conference, luncheon, meeting or retreat.  I would love to come!  And while I do not have a website up & running yet.  Let me share some of the many topics I feel confident to speak on (I am sure there are more…this is a quickly drawn up list):

  • Marriage Topics – Nurturing a healthy, happy & holy marriage, Becoming the best wife you can be, Preparing for a life long marriage, Overcoming challenges on the road to marital bliss, Love languages & personality teaching
  • Parenting Topics – Raising children of faith, Purposeful parenting, Family traditions, Bringing up good girls in an X-rated world, Mommy lessons from having 8 kids, Building your child’s confidence
  • Personal Growth Topics – Knowing who you really are to God, Trusting God, Help for the control freak, Living a balanced life, Letting the Lord be enough, Living a life of purity, Goals, dreams & visions, Discovering & using your gifts & talents, Married & wishing your were single OR Single & wishing you were married, Taming the tongue
  • Working at Home Mom Topics –  Running a successful home based business, Balancing Family & Business, Building a God honoring business

I have often tailored a message to a groups theme or purpose as well.  If you have an idea and I feel like I can meet your need, I am willing to do it! I appreciate your help in spreading the word for me, as well as your prayers or words of advise are always welcome!  I am trusting God to open the doors He wants me to walk through.

Ok, my latte is all gone…would love to hear what you have to say!

Until next time…..

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Filed under Life at the Lambdins, Life Lessons, Lifes Challenges, My "take"

September 9, 2011 · 7:43 pm

911: Remembering & Recommitting

September 11, 2001…where were you?

911 002I was actually in the Washington DC area on a business trip on that fateful day in American history, along with my then seven-year old daughter, Kristen. (she is now 17 and a senior in high school!) We were getting ready to fly home on that very morning the planes were flown into the twin towers in New York City.

And ironically I am in Virginia again on this 10th anniversary of 911.  This time I am here by myself without my precious Kristen.  I am here to help my mother who has recently had some intense health issues that require her to need assistance.  When I first made my reservations to come to the East coast it did not dawn on me that I would once again be in the nation’s capitol on September 11.  I believe this anniversary is an appropriate time to remember, to reflect, to honor those whose lives were lost and who gave sacrificially and to renew our commitments to our faith, our family & friends and our country. How significant then that the Lord would orchestrate the circumstances of my life to be in the same place I was on that fateful life changing day.

Here is an excerpt from my photo album written shortly after September 11, 2001. (I am so thankful that I took the time to write this down back then, one of the many bonuses of being a scrapbooker & journaler!)  –

911 003From the moment I turned on the television at my mother’s home in Springfield, Virginia…everything began to become surreal. I sat frozen alone on the couch as I realized the atrocity and severity of what was happening. Terrorists hijacked  two airplanes and crashed them into the twin towers in New York City. As the events unfolded I watched with horror, along with millions of Americans who were glued to their television sets.  It was like we were watching a nightmare and wondering what might happen next and if we would ever feel safe again.

All I could think was that I wanted to be home with my family. I was 3,000 miles away and with all air traffic being suspended indefinitely, there was no certainty of when I could get home. I called Dan who was still unaware of what was happening on the East Coast (It was still very early in California). He prayed for me & told me how much he loved me. He also shared how relieved he was that I was at home at my Mom’s and not on an airplane at that moment. As I sat back down to watch the unfolding drama I learned that another plane had crashed just down the freeway from where I currently was staying — into the Pentagon. I was stunned! 911 005What was happening…and what would be next? It was at that point I looked down at my confirmed airline itinerary dated September 11. 2001 from Washington DC to California. The full impact hit me. My daughter and I could have easily been  passengers on one of those airplanes heading to California. I began to cry & praise the Lord that it was not my time to die and that I was not on an airplane right then being diverted to another city somewhere in the United States.  Instead, I was safe at my mother’s home with my sweet daughter. I had a lot to be thankful for that day. We finally did get home five days later. (but not without several delays and obstacles including getting stuck in Minneapolis for a night and being graciously taken in by a business associate, Leanne Anderson, who rescued us from having to sleep in the airport) When we finally touched down in San Francisco, I cried. I had never been happier than to simply be home with my precious family.

911 001In the aftermath of 911, it was inspiring to see patriotism come to life in America. Everywhere you looked people were wearing red, white & blue, flying flags, putting up signs & showing their love for their country & fellow citizens. Flags were everywhere – on every home, hanging from bridges, on cars, on buildings, on clothing…it was overwhelming & emotional. I found myself with eyes filled with tears and getting choked up several times a day as I witnessed the love of others and the patriotism that had been sorely missing in the daily life of most Americans. People also began to give of their time, talent & treasure in abundance. On every street corner money was being collected & people gave freely. Many volunteered their time and stood in line for hours to give blood. It was an incredible moment in history to witness this outpouring of love & generosity.

911 004This tragedy of 911 also turned many hearts back to the Lord and to faith. Everyone was in desperate search of answers and in great need of peace, hope & security. People were coming together in droves to pray and seek God. Our common faith in God became evident to all. The cross rose up out of the ashes of the towers and became a symbol of hope for those at Ground Zero in New York. We all knew that we desperately needed God. No one was offended by people praying or evoking the name of Jesus. There was a National Memorial Service broadcast worldwide where Billy Graham boldly proclaimed the gospel.

September 11, 2001 was truly a day that changed everything. 

911Were you changed by the events of September 11?

Did you stop everything & order your priorities aright?

Did you have a renewed sense of patriotism & love for the USA?

Did you weep with those who lost loved ones and hold your precious family closer?

Did you give blood, donate your time or money in the aftermath?

Did it draw you to the Lord?

Perhaps on this anniversary of 911 it would do us all some good to recommit to these same things today.  In this ever-changing and turbulent times we are living…none of us knows what tomorrow will bring.

Be of sober spirit, be on the alert. Your adversary, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.  I Peter 5:8

It is so easy in the years following a disaster or life changing event to lose your resolve, be lulled into apathy or even forget the things that you thought would stay with you forever.  Take the time today to remember and recommit yourself to loving God, loving others, loving life and loving our country with the intensity we did after 911.

I will be re-committing my life to these values as I attend a memorial service in Washington DC on Sunday. I want to live my life as if each day could be my last –

  • ready to meet my Lord by humbly living a life pleasing to Him
  • loving my dear family & friends and spending time enjoying each other
  • reaching out with kindness and compassion to strangers, those in need and even those that I find challenging
  • not stressing about the small inconsequential things that try to irritate or distract me from the truly important things in life
  • joyfully serving my church, my community, my country and my world using my God-given gifts & talents to benefit others

What do you remember about the way your life changed after September 11? What values will you recommit to on this anniversary of that horrific day? Don’t let this moment pass you by without some reflection on the past and commitments for your future…in just a blink of an eye we will be another decade away from this fateful day…let’s be changed for the better!

God Bless America!

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Filed under Blessings, Endurance, Life at the Lambdins, Life Lessons, My "take", Priorities

June 16, 2011 · 4:51 pm

Times of Refreshing (Part 2)

Life….is hard.

When I look over my current prayer list and think about the many different circumstances that my friends, family and I are dealing with it can become overwhelming:

  • Horrendous, ongoing  and painful health issues
  • Loss of income, jobs  and financial worries
  • Broken and deeply damaged relationships
  • Challenges and changes in life and both unrest & fear about the future
  • Dealing with the gut wrenching pain of death & dying
  • Overall  exhaustion, weariness and stress

Can you relate to any of this happening in or around your life today?  Yes, life is hard.

Even as I sit in the comfort of a lounge couch on a cruise ship smoothly sailing over the open seas I am well aware of the depth of despair all around me as well as my personal current life challenges.  And yet I have peace in my mind, joy in my heart and satisfaction in my soul as I enjoy this amazing time of refreshment that is like a tall ice cold glass of fresh lemonade on a searing hot summer day.

It is because life is hard and often full of overwhelming exhaustion, worry and stress that we need to be refreshed regularly and the harder life is at any given moment the greater relief that refreshment brings.  This cruise however will all too soon come to an end and while the extended time away has been a blessing (see Times of Refreshing Part 1), I know that we all need regular times of refreshment in the midst of the craziness and often hardness of life.

What brings you regular refreshment?  Have you ever made a list of those things that refresh your spirit, nourish your soul and bring relief from the struggles of
life?  It would likely look different for each of us as we each have individual tastes, personalities and bents as well as different cultures and backgrounds.  As you think about what brings you refreshment, let me share with you my personal list:

  • Prayer – for me there is nothing better to bring peace than simply talking to God and listening to him speak to me through His still small comforting voice.  Now I can pray at anytime but if I truly get time alone to commune with the Lord….it refreshes my soul & lifts my spirit like no other. (Acts 3:19 – “times of refreshing come from the presence of the Lord”)
  • Praise – I get completely lost in a perfect heavenly place when I sing praises to my Lord – it might be in church on Sunday, in the shower, on a walk or in my car driving with the volume turned all the way up in my CD player – but praise and worship always does an amazingly divine thing in my heart and life!
  • My morning coffee – especially if I get to actually sit down and enjoy it while reading my daily devotions.  For me coffee is a relaxing experience not a “buzz” (really! I can drink Espresso at 11pm at night and go right to bed…in fact I actually think it puts me to sleep…strange I know)
  • Afternoon Tea – a beautiful china tea cup along with delicious Paris tea and some mouth-watering cookies or scones listening to classical music nourishes my body and my soul. Whether I am alone with a good book or enjoying the conversation of my girls it is a perfect respite in daily life.

  • Walking in a beautiful place – now for some of you daily exercise brings you refreshment and that is great!  I however am not one of those people…but taking a walk in beauty does do that for me.  Just this morning I walked over a mile on the deck of the ship looking out at the massive ocean, rocky shoreline and occasionally seeing a porpoise splash through the waves. Now that was refreshing! (and yesterday we went on an amazing hike in Ketchikan)

  • Sleep –  yes just simply sleeping  in comfort and without interruption (quite an accomplishment if you are a mommy) for seven or eight hours straight is often all that is needed to be refreshed. Sounds easy and yet….
  • Touching  – one of my “love languages” is physical touch so snuggling in bed with my toddlers, walking hand in hand with my daughters, cuddling & kissing on the couch with my love and warm loving  hugs from dear friends and family all refresh my heart & soul

  • Massages – my all time favorite way to check out for an hour…if only I had more money (trying to convince one of my girls to become a massage therapist)  Of course I must tell you that my amazing husband does give me a foot massage almost every night of my life…I am blessed!
  • Hot Showers & Hot Tubs – for me there is something about hot water that clears my mind.  Since we don’t have a hot tub (on my dream list) the showers work on occasion (it is a rare thing where I can actually take an entire shower without someone needing something…but that day will come all too quickly when I will no longer be interrupted so I try not to let it bother me)
  • Candlelight & Fire Glow – If you have ever been to our house for dinner, you know that low lights and candles are a “staple”.  It is because candlelight for me brings everything down a notch.  All the craziness or loud noise of the day seems to settle down under the glow of the candles.  If I ever need to relax I find that of I turn off the lamps and light a few candles I feel the tension releasing.  Of course a glowing fire in the winter, soft music, a warm blanket and a good book is almost instant refreshment(especially if I am sitting next to Dan)

  • Lunch with a Friend – I am blessed with a dozen friends who I regularly enjoy a lunch or coffee date with.  They are uplifting, encouraging, passionate people who both renew & refresh me. I always come away from these times with great joy and fulfillment. (and so yes, I schedule them regularly)

  • Date Night – When I wake up & look at the calendar that says – “Date Night”, I instantly feel excited and look forward to a night of perfect relaxation & refreshment.  There is nothing better for me than a night out with the man who is not only my love and my partner for life but truly my best friend.  The deep conversations, the connection and the love shared fills me to overflowing. Falling asleep at night after praying with this man is also one of the most satisfying  & refreshing moments in my day.

  • The Beach – this is my place of pure delight and refreshment.  Of course if you know me at all, you already are well aware of this! The sand in my toes, the crashing of the waves, the breathtaking sunsets, the exhilarating walks, the gentle breezes…I love it all.  The sights, the sounds & the smells of the sea! Thankfully I can be there in a 2 hour drive from my front door as well as finding a true “refreshment & renewal” beach retreat where I actually get to live there for a month each year. (Lord willing)

Wow!  What a list….even as I was writing it all down I was amazed at the number of ways (and I even forgot to include dark chocolate, writing, flowers and album making on my list of things that bring me refreshment!) that I have on a regular basis to be refreshed and renewed even in the midst of “normal” life (ie: not on an amazing refreshing Alaskan Cruise with my love that included just about everything on the above list). And I am sure that your list is or will soon be just as plentiful.

If you are in the midst of life being hard or you are feeling overwhelmed with worry, exhaustion or stress…take some time out today or tomorrow or this weekend to do something to refresh your mind, your soul and your spirit.  Let the Lord touch your life and His perfect peace fill you to overflowing in the midst of your challenging circumstances.

Some scriptures that may encourage & inspire you as you seek to be refreshed –

  • “Do not worry about anything, instead pray about everything. Tell God your needs & do not forget to thank Him for His answers. And  the peace of God which surpasses all understanding guard your heart & mind in Christ Jesus.” Phillipians 4:6-7
  • “You will keep him in perfect peace,Whose mind is stayed on You,Because he trusts in You.” Isaiah 26:3
  • “O God, You are my God; Early will I seek You;  My soul thirsts for You; My flesh longs for You  In a dry and thirsty land where there is no water. So I have looked for You in the sanctuary to see Your power and Your glory. Because Your lovingkindness is better than life, My lips shall praise You. Thus I will bless You while I live; I will lift up my hands in Your name. My soul shall be satisfied as with marrow and fatness, And my mouth shall praise You with joyful lips.” Psalm 63:1-5
  • Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Everlasting God, the LORD, the Creator of the ends of the earth Does not become weary or tired.  His understanding is inscrutable.  He gives strength to the weary, And to him who lacks might He increases power.  Though youths grow weary and tired, And vigorous young men stumble badly,  Yet those who wait for the LORD  Will gain new strength;  They will mount up with wings like eagles, They will run and not get tired,  They will walk and not become weary.” Isaiah 40:28-31

May you be richly blessed with  “times of refreshing that come from the presence of the Lord”.

If you want to post a comment and share some of the things that refresh you…we would all love to hear!

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Filed under Endurance, Faith, Life at the Lambdins, Life Lessons, Lifes Challenges, Overcoming

June 12, 2011 · 11:11 am

Times of Refreshing (part 1)

“The generous will prosper; those who refresh others will themselves be refreshed.”  Proverbs 11:25

As I write out this ancient proverb I am sitting aboard the Sea Princess with a gentle breeze blowing across my face as the slow rhythmic rocking back and forth of the waves causes me to relax and my body conforms into the lounge chair on the ships deck.  Yes, I am the grateful recipient of some very generous people who chose to bless Dan and me with an Alaskan Cruise in honor of our 25 years together in ministry and marriage!

1986 was a life changing year for us.  It was the year that the Lord brought a man & woman together who both loved the Lord and loved ministering to youth.  It was also the year that we had our first experience with the ministry of full time Christian Education and quickly developed a passion for the amazing opportunity it provided to mentor, disciple, love and impact young people for life.  In less than two years of marriage we knew that we wanted to commit our lives to the ministry of Christian education.  (despite the meager compensation, zero retirement plan, massive amount of work hours and having too many “bosses” – you see as a Christian educator you have to please not only your Principal, but your entire school board and the parents of every student – simply impossible!)

Last summer we organized a multi year reunion (classes of 1985 – 2000)of Brookside Christian High School alumni, the school where we ministered for 11 years before moving on to found Jim Elliot Christian High School.  It was a spectacular weekend of reminiscing, reuniting and remembering!  There was much laughter, love and we even all shed a few tears. I have been to many reunions over my lifetime and this was “hands down” the most real, the most fulfilling and the most joyful of them all.  You see we had something very special during the Brookside Christian High School “glory years” as many refer to them as.
We had:

  • A small tight knit group of under 200 students  each year from a wide variety of families, cultures and backgrounds
  • A group of staff members  who were committed to not merely teaching their subject matter but to pouring out their lives into young people
  • Chapel Services that featured some of the best youth speakers in the country and where students truly “met God” in a way that they had never before experienced
  • A student activity program to rival none other,  that not only created memorable moments to be cherished for a lifetime but built up student leaders, created lifetime bonds of friendship and provided a level of enthusiasm & excitement that made the school “the place to be”.

Not to say that BCHS was perfect…in fact in many ways it was very far from perfection (one of the reasons we chose to create Jim Elliot Christian High School to take our vision of the “perfect” Christian school to the next level) and yet there was something very special about that era and anyone who experienced it will vouch for that.  During those foundational years in our Christian Education experience both Dan and I held a myriad of positions which would ultimately give us the experience and expertise to start a new Christian school years later.  Dan held the positions of janitor (nothing better than to start at the bottom),  Teacher (Bible, Physical Education and even a short stint with US Government…you BCHS students rember that?), Athletic Director, Coach, Counselor, Vice Principal, Principal, Dean of Students and Chaplain.  I began as a Physical Education Teacher who was surprised at being given Typing classes (HA! I “hunt & peck”) but quickly began to pick up other jobs that I have been uniquely gifted to do. I became the Student Activity Director and Leadership Teacher, Yearbook & Journalism Advisor, Guidance Counselor, Admissions Director, Director of Student Affairs and Director of Development. I even spent several summers as the front desk secretary!  While at times
it seemed crazy to take on such a wide and varied number of positions (and even as I typed them all I got a bot exhausted!), the Lord knew that He was preparing us for a very special purpose down the road.  We would have never had the ability to begin a new school without the experience those positions brought, the years of ministering in a Christian school and the numerous BCHS students and families that would support and encourage us in the starting of JECHS.

So even though our time at Brookside ended abruptly and with much angst…we will never regret the experience we received, the lifelong relationships we made and the amazing opportunities we had to impact others. To God be the glory!

During the reunion weekend, our former students presented us with a gift of thanks and appreciation for our 25 years of service in Christian Education.  Apparently they had been emailing folks for several months asking for donations for the Lambdin’s and they ultimately were able to purchase an Alaskan Cruise for us to enjoy.  What a blessing!  While we are unaware of everyone who contributed to this amazing gift, we want to say a HUGE thank you for your generosity and for allowing us to be refreshed in such a wonderful way!  We know that the Lord, who is always true to His word, will indeed refresh you through your generosity to us!

In the next post I will share more about being refreshed, renewed & reenergized!

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Filed under Blessings, Callings, Jim Elliot Christian High School, Life at the Lambdins, Marriage

March 17, 2011 · 9:22 am

Happy 17th Birthday Kristen

My third daughter turns 17 today….how did that happen so fast? (answer: one day at a time)  I can remember as clearly as if it was yesterday the night of her birth.  Kristen Elizabeth Lambdin –

  • Kristen – means “follower of Christ”…and she has chosen to be just that.
  • Elizabeth which means God’s promise implying satisfaction and contentment along with thanksgiving and devotion…a perfect description of her heart.
  • Lambdin a last name that we have spent 24+ years being purposeful about it becoming a family name bearing a great legacy of faith and blessings for her, her children and her children’s children.

 Here is my birthday letter to her today taken from what I read to her at her recent Rite of Passage ceremony.

Dear Kristen….

My “perfect” child!

From the moment you made your quiet entrance into this world in the stillness of the night on March 17, 1994 to now you have truly been the easiest, sweetest most obedient child I have ever known.

 As a toddler you loved to just sit on my lap and cuddle up, content to just bask in the love of your Mommy’s arms. (no terrible twos for you!) You promised to never grow up and always be my little girl.  You did grow up though and yet you have kept all the excellent qualities of a child:

  • An amazing faith
  • A sincere desire to please & honor your parents and others
  • Unconditional love
  • And a sweet spirit

You have always had the heart of a servant…which means that you have a heart like the Lords!

 Matthew 20: 26- 28 — says

“Whoever wishes to become great among you shall be your servant, and whoever wishes to be first among you shall be your slave; just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.”

You truly are one of the great among us and you will be first in line to receive your rewards from God!

You have many strengths – you are organized, thorough, diligent, creative, a talented photographer, a competent athlete, and a hard working student.

You are also a true leader because you model the heart of a servant.  You are a young lady of integrity who truly desires to please the Lord in everything.

 When I look at your heart and your life I could not be more pleased with the person you have chosen to become. 

I love you so much and am so blessed to be your Mom!

Happy 17th Birthday! 

 

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Filed under Blessings, Life at the Lambdins

January 21, 2011 · 6:18 pm

Random, Abstract & Off the Wall

A new experience for me in the blogosphere…today and Monday I am a “guest blogger” over at Tommy Mom for my dear friend Teri Helms. The subject is one of my favorites – being purposeful about creating a home full of meaningful family traditions. So head on over and check it out! 

In the midst of writing for Teri I thought I better post something new on my blog since it has been over a month since you have heard a peep from me (unless of course you are my facebook friend and then you’ve heard more than you ever wanted to know!)

The winter fog here in the central valley of California seems to cloud my mind as well…so here is the most random, abstract and off the wall post you may ever read here on my blog.

“Mother of the Year” Award….Not!

What do you do when your teenage daughter comes in from “experimenting” with skateboarding (which you recommended against) and is in pain complaining that she fell off and is sure she broke her foot?  You tell her to “toughen up” and take a Tylenol, of course!  I mean come on!  I’ve been a Mom for 21 years and certainly I could tell if your foot was really broken….besides we don’t break bones in our family.

Fast forward two weeks later and we are in the doctor’s office getting an xray.  Guess what?  Her foot is broken and she now has a pretty purple cast.  So much for “Mother knows best”.  Just bring your fingers to your forehead in the shape of an “L” and call me a loser, I can admit when I messed up!

Loving Life Coaching  

Just in the past two weeks I have met with, talked on the phone or answered questions via email with over a dozen people giving advice, opinions and hopefully wisdom in the following areas – adoption, dating & relationships, parenting, college & career counseling and callings, raising girls, fundraising and philosophy of Christian education.  I love it! Now if I could just figure out a way to get paid to do this without charging the people receiving the “coaching”. (I know that sounds insane…but I really would love to just help people for free! It brings me great joy and fulfillment) Trying to figure it all out.

Family Photos – better than therapy, depression and anxiety meds or stress relievers

I took the dive into digital album making this year.  I have been taking exclusively digital photos for the past 4 years and decided it was time to start really organizing those photos and transition to digital “scrapbooking”…although my style of album making has always been less “scrapbooky” (is that a word?) and more like a yearbook.  So in true Beth Lambdin “jump off the cliff” style…I took a “crash course” in digital photo “stuff”, scheduled weekly digital classes and an all day Saturday workshop, transferred & organized  9,475 photos (and that was just those taken in 2010…excessive!), and have completed 27 digital 12×12 page prints to put in my CM albums.  Here is a sample page:

If you want to see all 27 pages here is a link – My First Digital Album

And you know what the very best thing is about working with and looking at your photos?  It allows you to relive all of the good times in your life (because we don’t take pictures of the not so good times like the dirty dishes piled high to the ceiling, the mold in my shower, the screaming child with the runny nose). It let’s you celebrate life’s highlights again.  It reminds you how much you love the people in your life and what great moments you have had together.  It makes you laugh and smile over & over again.  It is better than any therapy, any meds to make you happy or anxiety free and it instantly brings you joy, peace and love in your life.  Try it!

The Good News & The Bad News

The good news…I weigh exactly the same as I did before the holiday feeding frenzy began at Thanksgiving and carried on through Epiphany. 

The bad news…it is a good 20 lbs (ok, ok 30) more than what I need to weigh for my health and wardrobe. And so the life long (or at least since beginning mommyhood) battle continues. To eat or not to eat? Picked up a copy of  the new book by Lysa Terkeurst – Made to Crave – this month. It looks good (and so do those delicious orange creamsicle scones that my dear friend Rachel made yesterday….oy vey!)

Boys & Bunk beds

As of this week we now have a bunk bed in the “boys” room. (aka: Daniel’s room but he has never slept in there one night because he does not want to sleep alone so he has squeezed himself into the girls room for the past year and a half).  He did actually sleep in this room last night after convincing his sister Joy to join him. 

So….we have a boy’s room complete with a bunk bed and room for another one. Daniel wants us to “buy him a brother”. We want to adopt two boys from Ethiopia.  We have the room. We have the desire. We have the heart.

We don’t have…the money. ($40,000)  But God…..

What’s in your pocket?

I know the phrase is supposed to be “what’s in your wallet? (Master Card…right!)  Well since nothing is in my wallet I thought I’d share with you the things I find in my pockets (all four of them)

  • a small hair bow (which made me smile & remember to live in the moment)
  • trash (do you collect your kids trash too? such an odd Mom thing)
  • a pain pill for my daughter with the broken foot (hey they still work with a bit of fuzz on them)
  • a half eaten sucker in its wrapper (really??!)
  • several cards – debit, costco, insurance, a starbucks card with 65 cents on it (getting bent cuz they are in my back pocket)
  • a pen
  • a memory card (that’s a great place to store your photos – sarcasm -)

Give and it shall be given unto you

I cannot begin to do justice to this category by a few random thoughts.  So I just have to say in the past several months

  • we have made less income than we have in 14 years
  • we have given away more money, time and talent
  • we have paid all our bills on time and fed our family
  • we have been given more than you could imagine in ways that are unbelievable!

It is just true (not that we ever doubted) that if you give it will be given unto you….give of your time, your talent and your treasure….and watch what is given back to you!

Beach Holiday Countdown

The countdown has begun….in less than 3 weeks I will pack the car, load the youngest four kiddos and head over for my annual beach holiday in Aptos.  I cannot even begin to tell you the overwhelming sense of joy and peace that come over me just thinking about this.

It is NOT a vacation, mind you.  It is a true holiday as defined in the dictionary —

  1. a time or period of exemption from any requirement, duty, assessment
  2.  a religious feast; holy days
  3. a period of cessation from work or one of recreation (read this: re–creation)

And everyone needs one of these.  When was the last time you just “lived” – no appointments, no rushing around, no work, no “to do” list, no phone calls, no plan – just truly a time of refreshment, relaxation and rejuvenation?  A time to think, to read, to commune with God, to enjoy His creation, to build relationships with loved ones and to live in the moment. I highly recommend it!

Is your family car a mobile trash can, library and closet? Just wondering….

Oh….and how many of you find random Christmas items in the oddest places weeks after you have diligently organized and put it all up in the attic? What’s a girl to do?

I warned you this would be random, abstract and a bit off the wall….hope it blessed, inspired or challenged someone out there! Hope to be back here again soon.

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Filed under Blessings, Economics, Family Traditions, Life at the Lambdins, Life Lessons, My "take"

December 17, 2010 · 3:07 pm

Cultivating Culture at Christmas

Last night I took a couple of the girls (the one’s who weren’t studying for finals…thumbs down to schools who are still in session even one day past December 15) and Granny to a local Christmas concert. It was a lovely evening listening to a youth chorale sing beautiful Christmas music in the majestic atmosphere of an old brick church complete with stained glass windows. As I sat there taking in the beauty all around me I realized how blessed I was to be raised in a home that appreciated culture and  I am truly grateful for this influence from both of my parents.

Experiencing and appreciating culture adds great value to our lives. I can’t begin to imagine my life without art, music, theater, literature and life long learning.

Art  is a work of creativity and God is the ultimate creator…all we need to do is look around at His creation to see the most amazing drawings, painting and sculptures. They have no rivals. When we see amazing art we are getting a glimpse of the creativity of God. When I see a thing of beauty it takes my breath away and causes my spirit to soar.

Music and poetry inspires us on so many levels…touching our heart and soul. It can cause us to rejoice and praise the Lord, dance, clap, shout, cry, laugh and sing.  I am often transformed to an amazing place of  complete joy, perfect love and glorious peace after listening  to inspiring music. It moves me in a way that nothing else does.

Literature and theater can instantly place us into someone elses story…giving us compassion, insight and even vision and motivation that can change the course of our lives.  Stories and plays can inspire and challenge me to do great things, take me on unbelievable adventures, touch my heart, teach me life lessons and bring me great joy and laughter along with tears.

Truly these things are a gift from God who is the creator of all things beautiful, awe-inspiring and good. I cannot imagine life without them.

It helped that growing up we often lived in large metropolitan cities where the cultural opportunities abounded. I,  however, have raised my family in a place not known for it’s cultural opportunities and yet because I believe that the arts add so much value to life I have chosen to actively pursue these experiences for my children.

Christmas provides the perfect time to cultivate culture in our lives and to influence and teach our children to appreciate the arts.  There are an abundance of cultural opportunities in even the smallest communities during this season. (and at this time of year there are many experiences that are free as well for those of us who have limited resources) 

Some of the ways you can take advantage of these opportunities

  • Find local Christmas concerts, ballets or church performances to attend…they are abundant
  • Check out your local museum…they often have special Christmas displays or exhibits
  • Call around to your civic theater, local high schools or colleges to see if there are any plays being performed (you can almost always find someone doing “A Christmas Carol” by Charles Dickens)
  • Churches often have “living nativities” or special art displays (not to mention if you can find any older more traditional churches to visit the architecture, stained glass windows and sculptures are a cultural experience in themselves)
  • Christmas Home Tours are also prevalent at this time of year and are another great way to enjoy art, architecture and beauty

You can also create an atmosphere of cultivating culture in your own home.  We have been very purposeful with our children in bringing cultural experiences to them (it is also very helpful when your kids are small and may not be able to sit through a “live” performance or production)

  • Listening to classical Christmas music!  While contemporary seasonal music is the mainstay of our Christmas season we are sure to also include classics like The Boston Pops Orchestra.  Their rendition of a Christmas Festival is a staple in our home, in fact it is the first official Christmas song to be played after Thanksgiving.  I love it that my 3 year old son heard the opening strands in the car last week and enthusiastically shouted out – “Mommy! It’s Christmas!”
  • Reading Christmas Classics!  I don’t know why but it always seems so much easier to read books out loud at Christmastime.  I guess the combination of the cozy living room complete with a fire in the fireplace, twinkling Christmas lights, hot cocoa, cold weather that invites you to stay home and the extra family time without the pressure of school and work.  We have an entire box of Christmas books that we have collected over the years that only come out at Christmastime.

  • Watching Christmas Classic Movies!  Again the new Christmas movies are great for family movie night and we enjoy them immensely but there are a few “must watch” movies that are full of value and culture –  White Christmas, A Wonderful Life, A Christmas Carol, The Nativity, Miracle on 34th Street and Little Women (ok so it’s not specifically a Christmas movie….but I have decided that it is for us). 
  • Watching Inspirational youtube videos!  Even if you can’t get out to a concert or live in a remote area without access to much culture, thanks to the Internet it can be brought right into your own home.  Every time I find an inspiring or excellent youtube I make my kids sit down and watch it. Here are some of my favorites this year:





  • Encouraging your children to put on a Christmas play of their own.  There are so many great Christmas stories to choose from or they could write their own.  Tell them that they can perform it as a Christmas gift to the family on Christmas day or other larger family get together.  Help them create costumes, gather props and any other support they need but let them create and perform. Besides adding culture and creativity to your life it will be some of the most memorable moments of their childhood.

  • Another easy way to add some art & creativity to your lives is through making homemade Christmas ornaments, Christmas cards and even decorating Christmas cookies.

  • Hosting our annual Mother Daughter Tea is one of our favorite Christmas traditions.  We have been hosting this tea for my girls friends and their mothers for 12 years.  Besides being a lot of fun for everyone it is a fabulous chance to add beauty and culture to our lives.  The fine Christmas china, setting a decorative table, dressing up, practicing etiquette and table manners are all great cultural experiences.  We also give the guests an opportunity to share their talents by singing, playing a musical instrument, reciting a poem or scripture, dramatic reading or signing to a musical selection. It is fabulous!

  • Memorizing the Christmas story from the Bible.  Most every year we take some time in the fall to memorize the story of Christ’s birth out of the book of Luke.  The younger school age children recite it on Christmas Eve.
  • Family Christmas Caroling Night, another family favorite tradition.  Each year we go out and sing Christmas carols at the doors of our friends & family members. It is a great chance to learn classic Christmas carols (and we sing all the verses…as my Mom would say…a song is like a poem and of you don’t sing all the verses you miss the entire meaning), learn to sing and a wonderful family bonding time.  If you did not want to trek all over the city singing you could simply sing around your fireplace, piano or Christmas tree or even go to a few rest homes, hospitals or children’s homes.

It’s not too late to add some culture to your Christmas this year. I would love to hear your ideas for cultivating culture both at Christmas as well as throughout the year.

PS – Tonight we will dress up and head out as a family (minus “the littles”) to a nice dinner and to see the Nutcracker Ballet compliments of my mother. (aka: Granny).  May I suggest that if you are a grandparent looking for a valuable gift to give your grandkids that will last a lifetime (rather than a few weeks or months)…give them a gift of a cultural experience!  And if you can go with them…even better yet!

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Filed under Christmas Season, Inspiration, Life at the Lambdins, Parenting

December 2, 2010 · 8:54 am

Christmas Greetings from the Lambdins

December 1, 2010

Merry Christmas from the Lambdins!

This is my third year of doing an “electronic” only Christmas greeting and while I really like the old fashion way better (you remember right? envelopes, stamps…they called it mail!), I have resigned myself to this new way of life as it is the wisest use of our resources. (although, I do regret that our family photo is no longer adorning the fridge of so many of our family & friends)  Thanks to email, facebook and my blog many of you are well caught up on “Life at the Lambdins” so feel free to skim this letter or just enjoy the pictures!  You all hold a special place in our hearts & lives and we value this opportunity to stay connected.

We are living the good life!

This month on December 20, Dan and I will celebrate 24 years of marriage and we are still loving life, loving the Lord and loving each other.  We continue to serve, disciple and minister to young people and their families. This is our 25th year in Christian education and we enjoyed an amazing reunion over the summer of students, staff and families from our years at Brookside Christian High School.  Hundreds of students returned and it was an amazing weekend of renewed friendships, faith and our belief in this life changing ministry.  We were beyond blessed at this reunion to be given a gift of a cruise to Alaska which we will take next Spring…looking forward to living the good life!

Dan…a milestone birthday celebrated this year – 50 years of life, continues in his 13th year at Jim Elliot Christian High School as Chaplain & Bible Teacher, coaching volleyball and soccer (and looking to someday returning to coaching football for Daniel), dutifully takes care of all the “g” jobs at home – gas, garbage, grass, grilling & anything gross, is a fabulous & faithful father to his eight children, “like a father” to countless others, an ideal husband and truly a godly man (yes I can attest to the fact that the man he portrays to the world is the man he is behind closed doors)…living the good life!

Beth (the author of this letter who by the way did not get the approval of any family member for commentary made here)…is in a constant state of transition (a classic example: took a break from reviewing the 18 year old daughter’s college applications to change the baby girl’s diaper), recently was released from my position as Director of Development at JECHS and am pursuing a speaking and writing ministry through a nonprofit we are starting called Inspire Ministries, hoping for 2011 to be a year of God opening doors, loving being a Mommy to many different personalities, ages and stages, blessed with an abundance of friends both near & far (loved seeing my high school classmates at our 30 year reunion!), passionate about so many things, thrilled to have been Mrs. Dan Lambdin for now half my life, still trying to accomplish more than is humanly possible (good thing I have an “in” with the Divine)…living the good life!

Michelle…a milestone birthday celebrated – 21, is a junior at King’s College in New York City, using her leadership skills as President of the “House of Truth”, working three jobs to get herself through college, came home for a week at the beach during Spring Break, the entire summer and for a special trip this fall (made it to the big birthday bash for Dad & Amy, attended a high school friends wedding & enjoyed the fall season in Stockton for the first time since 2006), developing lifelong college friendships, loving the city, cooked her first Thanksgiving dinner (and did it while watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade out the apartment window), going to China next summer….living the good life!

Amy…a milestone birthday celebrated – 18, is a senior at Jim Elliot Christian High School, intensely playing volleyball, soccer, powder-puff football as well as swimming (where she just competes for “fun” although you would never know that based on her competitive times & results), got her driver’s license, voted in her first election (our political plan is beginning to pay off…just you wait California in another 10 years there will be 8 Lambdin voters!), applying to colleges, a class of 2011 spirited senior surrounded by fabulous friends…living the good life!

Kristen…a milestone birthday celebrated – 16 (and sadly due to our recent financial setback did not get to go to NYC on the traditional Lambdin 16th birthday adventure…but did she utter one word of complaint or disappointment? No, gotta love this amazing girl!), junior year at JECHS, plays volleyball, powder-puff football and soccer, solid academic student, friend to all, always serving and giving, beginning to look at colleges, celebrating her Rite of Passage in January, loves to cook, clean, decorate and organize, wonderful group of friends…living the good life!

Rebekah…a 15 year old freshman at JECHS (yes we have three high school students and we love it!), playing volleyball, powder-puff football, basketball (yay! A new sport to watch) and soccer, became a licensed soccer referee (along with Amy & Kristen) and loved the job & the money, one grade short of straight “A’s” (do they call that a Navajo flaw?), went to Uganda on a life changing missions trip, involved in Interact Club, leading others with boldness and confidence,  making many new friends and staying close to the old ones….living the good life!

Grace…turning 12 this week and is in 6th grade, now the eldest “in charge” at home every day, becoming a leader and trainer for “the littles”, swim team athlete but took a year off soccer (ok not because she wanted to but I needed the break!), traveled to Washington DC and New York with her Granny in the Spring, crowned a Missionette Honor Star, beginning the babysitter circuit (with lots of experience), enjoying her sweet friends, growing up…living the good life!

Joy…the spunky, spirited, spitfire of a 7 year old in the 2nd grade, to her everything is fun and funny, takes hours to do the simplest of chores as she gets distracted by anything in sight (but she is having fun!), sang the National Anthem at summer swim meet in front of hundreds, swimmer, friends galore, spends her days singing, giggling, playing and acting out wild theatricals (ok I do make her do lessons too!)…living the good life!

Daniel…the 3 year old boy spends his days being one of the following (in no particular order):

  • Walker Texas Ranger
  • Buzz Light Year(“ to the rescue!”)
  • Luke Skywalker
  • Roy Rogers
  • The boy who loves his Mommy

along with playing football, baseball, basketball, soccer or recently golf, has a best friend named Andrew who he would spend every waking moment with if he could, tells everyone his mom is going to buy him two brothers (hmmmm…for those inquiring minds yes we are hoping & praying that the Lord would allow us to adopt two orphan boys from Ethiopia…and yes our greatest obstacle, but not Gods, is the money), every night he prays before dinner…”Lord bless our food and please don’t spank my bottom”. Yup, he is definitely…living the good life!

Christiana…besides being simply the cutest 19 month old baby girl in the world she spends her day following Daniel and Joy (who she has renamed “Roy” and we think it might stick) all over the house, dancing every time she hears music, singing “Oh Happy Day”, playing, smiling, laughing (that deep belly laugh that makes everyone who hears it laugh), being cuddled, loved and hugged by her big family as well as everyone who walks through the door, eating and sleeping as desired. Mmmmm…hands down…living the good life!

We hope that this Christmas season finds you living the good life!  We believe that “the good life” – a purposeful, abundant and then eternal life –  is ultimately found through a relationship with Jesus Christ as our Savior and Lord.  Our prayer is that your relationship with Him be real, renewed and refreshed during this Christmas season and throughout the New Year.

If you are local or in the area on Wednesday December 22 between 6pm – 10pm…stop by our annual Christmas Open House…we would love to see you and give you each a warm heartfelft holiday hug! 

Blessings,

Beth…for all the Lambdin clan

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Filed under Christmas Season, Life at the Lambdins

November 15, 2010 · 12:41 pm

Who knew?

Thirty years ago today I was invited to be the “special guest” at the 18th birthday dinner of a new friend who I had known for just a couple of months as a freshman at the University of the Pacific.  We had met in August of 1980 where we lived a few doors down from each other in Grace Covell Dormitory on campus.  We didn’t really have much in common other than our living situation. She was a “local” having arrived at UOP from the nearby city of Lodi and I had come from San Diego which was almost 500 miles away (and my parents had moved 3000 miles away to the state of Virginia shortly after I began college!)  She grew up in a large, loud, “beer on tap” in the basement, Catholic family and I was raised with a “prim and proper”, teetotaling, Protestant heritage. She was a talented, intense and competitive athlete who was attending college on a softball scholarship, I was an average field hockey player who simply enjoyed the game and thought it would be a “fun” to play in college. She was labeled a “wild” girl and I had a “good” girl reputation. She wore athletic sweats 24/7 and I was often found dressed in Izod shirts and penny loafers.

But despite our differences I enjoyed her company and she appeared to find me amusing.  Still I was surprised to be the only “non” family member asked to  join her very special birthday dinner at The Big Yellow House here in Stockton.  After all she had many life long friends in the area and an entire UOP softball team to choose from….why me?  I accepted her sweet invitation seeing it as an opportunity to build our friendship and be a blessing to her on her special day (as well as my commitment to never pass up a chance to not eat a meal in the dorm cafeteria!).

It seems that God, in His providence, was setting the stage for not only a lifelong friendship but for us to eventually become bound together as forever family.  You see, my freshman friend was none other than, Jennae Lambdin who two years later became my sister in Christ and six years later became my sister-in-law!  Who knew that as I sat around that dinner table listening to all the simultaneous lively conversations, the abundant laughter, course jesting and birthday toasts that this family would one day be mine? (I certainly would have never entertained such a concept) I felt oddly out of place and vastly different from the Lambdin clan and yet at the same time accepted and loved simply because I was Jennae’s friend.  That day – November 15, 1980 was the beginning of my “adoption” into this family, who even years before it was evident that I would officially become a “Lambdin” (marrying Dan was not something I ever considered for the first five years I knew him…but you can read that story here – My God Inspired Love Story), they were my home away from home.

Who knew?

Certainly not me!  

Jennae? Not likely since I was not even her first choice to invite to her birthday dinner. 🙂

Dan? hmmmm…I think not (He had his mind on other things than his sister’s strange “religious” friend)

The Lambdin’s? They probably do not even remember that I was there that night.

No, none of us were even the slightest bit aware of the great beginnings that were set into motion that special evening.  

Yet God knew!

I am thankful today that both Jennae and I were open to a friendship of complete opposites.  I am thankful that the Lambdin family had (and still has) a warm “welcome sign” to anyone who wants to be a part of their lives.  I am thankful that I chose to join in a celebration only knowing one person at the party. (how often in our insecurity do we say “no, thank you” to new or potentially uncomfortable situations where we won’t know anyone?) But mostly I am thankful for God’s leading, guidance and providential hand in my life.

Each and everyday there are the possibilities of new beginnings, potential life changing relationships, experiences (both good & bad) and inspirations that may set things in motion that will change the course of our lives.  Often you never know, until much further down the road, how the things that happen today will greatly impact your life. 

Follow God. Listen to His whispers in your heart. Embrace new opportunities, new experiences and new friendships. Life truly is a God inspired adventure!

Happy birthday to my dear friend of 30 years, my sweet sister in Christ and my amazing sister-in-law…Jennae Marie Lambdin!

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Filed under Blessings, Faith, Life at the Lambdins, Life Lessons

September 25, 2010 · 4:30 pm

Seasons of Change

This past week my calendar read….First day of Autumn!

Ahhhh Fall…one of my favorite seasons of the year.   This month we finally experienced some relief from our HOT, HOT summer temperatures but in typical fashion the thermometer started inching upward on Thursday just as I was ready for soup on the dinner table, a fire in the fireplace and crisp cool sweater weather.

Living in Northern California we get a few more “signs” that it is truly fall than do my So Cal friends but nothing near the cool weather or brilliant colors on the landscape of those living in the northeast.  But despite the 90+ temperatures and air conditioning running full blast this week I “created” our personal change of season.

Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Cookies made in honor of the beginning of fall…delicious!

The newest chore chart gets a fall makeover!

Colorful fall flowers always make you feel in the season

Pumpkin Spice Latte’s at Starbucks – fall must be here!

Our annual trip to Apple Hill the last Friday of September ushers in the fall season for the Lambdins

and one of my favorite fall activities – Friday night football games!

Yes, I love the fall!  I actually love each change of season with all its fresh new weather, landscapes, decor, colors, food and activities.  Isn’t God good? Just as the current season begins to lose some of its luster and appeal  He ushers in a brand new season that seems to bring with it a new energy and outlook on life.  I am sure many of you are nodding your head in agreement as you are beginning to enjoy the delights of this new fall season.

And yet….

I also am aware of how many people seem to resist change in general.  Of course no one welcomes change that brings sorrow, pain or hardship to life and we all eagerly embrace change that involves love, happiness or our well being. But I hear folks of all ages and all walks of life gripe, complain and whine when a simple change seems to be heading their way. We easily become “creatures of habit” comfortable in the “sameness” of our lives.  We get use to doing things a certain way and often do not think “outside the box” to investigate new or different ways of thinking or getting things done.  We also often try to live our lives according to the cultural “norm” we find all around us and even look down upon anyone who does things in a different way.  Or we simply just get into a rut of living…carrying on in the same mundane fashion day after day, week after week, month after month and year after year.

Then on the other side of the coin…there are those who say they want change in their life but are not willing to do anything differently to bring about that change.  Whether it is a change needed in a relationship, job situation, physical health habits or social situation we often simply carrying on in a difficult situation or unhealthy pattern rather than instituting necessary changes in our lives

Albert Einstein once said “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”.  How many of us if we were honest would be, by this definition, considered insane at times?

Do you need to make a change in your life? (I know a few areas in my life that are in need of a change!)

Take a moment to evaluate areas of your life that may need a change

  • Do you need to make a change in a relationship to make it better or bring it to an end?
  • Do you need to make a job or career change?
  • Do you need to change your financial status or spending patterns?
  • Do you need to become more purposeful in your parenting or change your discipline methods for your children?
  • Do you need to make a change in your eating habits or physical exercise routine (or non routine)?
  • Do you need to make changes in your character or spiritual life? 
  • What other areas of your life may need a change?

Why not sit down with a piece of fresh apple pie along with a hot cup of coffee and take the time to write down the change you desire in your life at this time along with a few ideas of ways to make it happen.

Secondly maybe you are in a season of change in your life as we currently are in. (if you missed our newest adventure – you can read about it here – https://bethlambdin.net/2010/09/04/to-life-to-life-lchaim/)  Maybe you have recently moved to a new city, taken a new job or become unemployed.  Some are experiencing an empty nest for the first time. Others lives have been turned upside down by the arrival of a new baby. Perhaps you are newly single through death or divorce.  I know of many who have recently lost a loved one and will be walking through their first fall and upcoming holiday season with a piece of their heart missing.

Is it the time to embrace this season of change that is upon you?  Do you need to take a deep breath and look around at the new opportunities on the horizon that change inevitably brings to us?  Do you need to hear a fresh word from the Lord and to rest in His trusted arms during this season of change?

In these upcoming weeks as we watch the spectacular season of summer fade away and change into the delights of the fall let it remind us to both make the changes we need to move forward in our lives and as many of us are doing at this time – embrace a new season of life and look for its own unique beauty and special blessings.

Off to make some yummy apple dump cake with the delicious apples we got at the hill yesterday!

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Filed under Life at the Lambdins, Life Lessons

September 15, 2010 · 4:07 pm

Chosen to love and to be loved

Today was the deadline to turn in our adoption testimony and pictures to Show Hope – Steven Curtis Chapman’s orphan care ministry – who generously gave us a grant that helped with some of our adoption expenses.  I thought I would share it with you all, along with this word of encouragement – If you have ever considered adoption (and perhaps even if you have not) but out of fear, obstacles or finances you have not pursued it…take that first step today towards the most amazing, beautiful and miraculous experience of your life!

Sunday May 17, 2009 was a stellar day for the Lambdin family!  It was the day that the Lord placed into our loving arms, through the miracle of adoption – our newest daughter – Christiana Michelle Lambdin.

The journey that began 19 months prior and consisted of mountains of paperwork, home studies, interviews, exhaustive investigations, steadfast determination, hope deferred, patient perseverance, government bureaucracy, faith, fundraising and flying thousands of miles from California to Tennessee….came to both a joyous end and exciting beginning when we looked into the eyes of the most beautiful, perfect and precious six-week old baby girl.  The tears flowed from everyone in the room as we rejoiced in the most amazing gift we were ever chosen to receive!

Yes, we were chosen!  Is there anything better than being the one chosen?  Throughout life we rejoice when we or our loved ones are chosen to – be on the team, win an award, get invited to the party, attend a desired college, be promoted at work or be honored for an achievement. It is such an amazing moment when you realize you have been the one chosen. For decades we have experienced the joy and fulfillment of knowing that God has chosen us for His purpose, His glory and His kingdom but I must tell you that being chosen to adopt this sweet baby girl was a pinnacle moment in our life!

  • We were chosen by the birth mother to raise her child in a loving Christian home (she specifically wanted “church goin’ folks” for her baby).
  • We were chosen by the adoption agency, Life Choices as a qualified family to adopt one of their beautiful babies.
  • We were chosen by Show Hope to receive a grant to help with the financial needs of this adoption. 
  • We were chosen by friends, family members and even strangers who believed in us enough to give of their money to cover the remaining expenses of adoption that we did not have available to us.
  • We were chosen by God to experience firsthand what it means to be adopted by Him – “He predestined us to adoption as children through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the kind intention of His will” Ephesians 1:5  “…you have received a spirit of adoption as children by which we cry out, ‘Abba Father!’”  Romans 8:15

 And yet there is more…

  • We were chosen by Christiana! 

With every smile, every wet kiss, every squeal of delight when I walk into the room, every time she calls me “Mama”,everytime she lays her head on my shoulder to cuddle or surrender to sleep and even when she is hurt and will not be comforted by anyone else….I am struck by the fact that she has chosen me! 

As we prepared for this adoption many questions were asked along the way by those all around us regarding different aspects of adoption.  Often the questions would include concern as to if we thought we might find it difficult to love a child who “was not our own”.  I summarily dismissed these concerns for several reasons:

  1. First, my husband is obviously “not my own” (biologically related to me) and I love him just fine. (and vice versa) Anyone who believes they cannot love someone who is not biologically related to them better take a second look before marrying.
  2. I had already birthed seven children all with different personalities, weaknesses, annoyances, challenges and flaws…I had managed to love each of them despite these hardships so certainly I could love any child God gave me through birth or adoption.
  3. I do not believe that love – true love – is a feeling but rather it is a choice.  Don’t get me wrong, feelings are nice but they are not a good foundation for love because feelings are also fickle…they can be really beautiful one minute and unbelievably ugly the next.  Anyone who has been married for five minutes can attest to the fact that loving “feelings” come and go.  No, love is a choice to act in a loving way no matter how your current feelings happen to be fluctuating.  Love is making a lifelong commitment to a person to be faithful, kind, self-sacrificing and giving.  We knew that we could make a lifelong commitment to love an adopted child.

What I had never considered was the unconditional and undeserving love that would be poured out to me from my adopted child. You see, I thought she would have to learn to love me over the years.  While my “bio kids” appeared to come out of the womb attached to their Mommy & Daddy, I assumed because I had not birthed Christiana that I would have to “earn her love” through my actions of love, care and service. Was I ever wrong!  From the moment she was placed in my arms, she looked up into my face and her eyes overflowed with joy, acceptance and love. That love has been poured out to us daily,  growing because she is learning more ways of expressing that love as she develops into a darling toddler, yet it has been there in her heart and in her eyes ever since that first day.  Yes, we have been chosen by Christiana to be freely and unconditionally loved and that love has changed us profoundly.

As a large family who is in the full time ministry of Christian education we never thought that we could afford to adopt a child.  Yet, we stepped out in faith and the Lord provided.  We  are so grateful for those donors who give to Show Hope so that they can provide grants to help with the often overwhelming expenses of adoption.  We know that the Lord used this wonderful organization to increase our faith and help us to move forward towards  adopting our precious gift from God. You who have given to this ministry have been chosen by God to partner with Him and others to participate in the miracle of adoption. Our gratitude to you is overwhelming!

If you have adopted a child or been adopted yourself, I would love for you to share your adoption story in the comments section of this blog in hopes of encouraging others to consider opening their hearts and homes to become a forever family to a waiting child.  Adoption is truly an amazing miracle and a priceless gift!  Maybe God is choosing you to be given a miracle and gift too!

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Filed under Adoption, Blessings, Faith, Life at the Lambdins

September 14, 2010 · 9:13 pm

Tea Time Tuesday – beginning again

Our school year routine is back in full swing!

It is a bit different for me this year because for the first time since 1998  I only have two home schoolers (6th grade and 2nd grade).  Last week I was a bit melancholy about the whole situation as it seemed a bit small, quiet and lonely.  But this week I have recovered and began to get excited about all the great things we have in store for us this year.  I am a fairly eclectic homeschool Mom not really following one system or philosophy of schooling. 

One of the things that we have recently decided to do together is reading biographies of great men and women of faith  – George Mueller, Amy Carmichael, Hudson Taylor, Charles Spurgeon, Jim Elliot, David Livingston – to name just a few.  This week we began with Brother Andrew, reading his biography together aloud and stopping to review vocabulary words (grammar), looking at maps to see where his home in Holland was as well as how close they were to Germany (geography), going on the Internet for a picture of the Nazi Germany flag (history), and discussing how their own great-grandfather was killed in World War II.  All of that while being inspired and challenged by God’s work in  Andrew’s  life and his amazing faith.  Now that is my kind of school! (We also spent the late afternoon while the “littles” were napping watching Sound of Music because as we were reading the girls were reminded of things in the movie concerning the German invasion of Austria before the war….music, history & culture – bonus!)

We also started up our weekly – Tea Time Tuesday!

Tea Time Tuesday (yes it is on Tuesday because I love alliterations!) is something that we began years ago when I had four daughters being homeschooled together.  I decided to set time aside every Tuesday afternoon during the school year to have a “formal” tea complete with the fancy china, delicious teas, homemade goodies, classical music and a decorated table. Besides it being enjoyable, relaxing and fun I wanted to use this time to be purposeful about training, teaching and mentoring my daughters in:

  • proper manners, ladylike behavior and etiquette
  • modesty in dress and action
  • purity and godliness
  • relationships and courtship

As we sat down today to have our first tea of the season I realized that these two girls were very young when we began Tea Time Tuesday events and that perhaps we needed to “begin again” in our training.  So today we chatted over tea about the use of the words – please, thank you, you’re welcome and excuse me. We discussed that your napkin should be in your lap and used to dab your mouth clean (as opposed to wiping your mouth on your sleeve which is the norm for the 7-year-old right now).  We also brought out one of our favorite books…”The Princess and the Kiss” and read it aloud.  What a great message about saving your heart for the man you will marry! (complete with beautiful illustrations)

I have also decided that even though my high school girls lives are full to the brim with school work, sports, clubs, church, chores and jobs that I need to make time at least monthly to have a “Tea Time” with them during their final years of being in our home so that I can continue to influence them in these areas through reading books, telling stories and having discussions.  I will simply have to put it on the calendar and “make it happen”!

Perhaps we’ll call it – Team Tea for Three?

We also solved the problem of “the boy” wanting to disturb our tea party by setting him and our neighbor boys up in the farthest back corner of the backyard and giving them PB&J sandwiches and apple sauce with some ice tea (with of course plastic plates & cups). That kept them distracted long enough for us to enjoy our tea time! (another lesson for the girls?? “Food – the way to a man’s heart.”)

 I guess I have a few years to decide what type of similar idea that Dan can regularly do with “the boy” (and hopefully by then it will be “boys” should we get the desire of our hearts – adopting two young boys from Ethiopia) to instill these values, philosophies, paradigms and character qualities in him. (ideas anyone?) Although you can be sure any boys in our home will also occasionally attend our tea time so that he can learn to play the role of a proper gentleman as well as being wild at heart!

PS – If you want to read my other blog posts about past Tea Time Tuesdays you can find them here.

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Filed under Homeschool, Inspiration, Life at the Lambdins, Raising Girls, Tea Time Tuesday

September 13, 2010 · 12:54 pm

Chores “It’s a Hard Knock Life” – Part 2

Isn’t it just the way it goes?

I write a post on chores and training your children to be good workers and what happens? You guessed it…we had one of the worst weeks of chore conflict in years! Yes, complete with angry kids, an angry mom, screaming, accusations, defensiveness, crying and punishments. Not fun! (Calgon..take me away…far away)

I guess I should have anticipated that happening. Immediately after posting Chores – “It’s a Hard Knock Life” last Monday the “hits” on that blog entry sky rocketed, the comments came in one after another and the requests for my list of chores for each room were too numerous to count. It obviously is an area of struggle and desire for improvement for many of us Moms (and Dads too – Hi Tim!). I have learned during my 25 years of preaching, motivational speaking, sharing and writing that when you truly have something to say that adds value to others in any area of life you can count on being “attacked” in that very area. We had a full force war going on over here last week!

The end results were good as we identified several problem areas, realized that I needed to be a bit more “hands on” in my training during this particular season in our family and we dealt head on with some character flaws in a few of the children (the “L” word – L.A.Z.Y.). 

For all who asked for the list of chore details per room here is a PDF of this document  – Chore List (HT: my sister Caroline)

And for those inquiring minds that want more information…here is a list of FAQ’s

What if the kids do not do their chores?

Ummmmm…I am the boss, the dictator, the Mom! Obedience is not optional. 🙂

That said, with 8 children I have had my share of strong-willed, defiant children (and a couple “perfect” ones too!). Some take longer to get under control than others. (working on 15 years with one…love that “apple who didn’t fall far from the tree” girl!) Some take more supervision. Some need effective consequences. But everyone knows that they must comply. It is truly as simple as this – You do not get to do anything fun, go anywhere or have any thing that resembles a “good time” until the chores are completed to my satisfaction. (and yes, there have been times that they have missed a meal or stayed up past their bedtime and suffered the early morning wake up call….but you do not go to sleep until it is done!)

 What if they are not done like you would do them? 

 It depends!  I do not expect the younger ones to be able to do the same level of cleaning that I can do…so I “get over it”. (nope I do not “re-do” or complain)  However by the time they reach about 12 – 14 years old I expect them to clean as well as any competent adult. (and if they can’t then I need to do some re-education)

What age did you start different chores? 

When they are 2-4 they are expected to throw away trash, pick up toys, get dressed, brush their teeth and follow Mommy around watching and learning.  I let them help with lots of things. These are great ages because they usually want to help out!

At 4-6 they are “in training” – which means they get put on the chore chart as an “assistant” to one of the older children. I realize if you have only 2 or 3 children close together or when you are beginning with your eldest this will not work thus you will have to be the “trainer” with an assistant.  During these two to three years they learn how to do all the various chore jobs. (apparently all trainers are not equal since while I was writing this my 7-year-old did not sweep the crumbs from under the dining room table and then blamed her trainers – aka – the “big sisters” for not teaching her correctly…hmmmm….girls?)

At 7 they are put officially on the chore chart fully responsible for their list of chores for that week. Each year after that they should get more accurate and efficient with their given responsibilities. By 12 they should be able to clean for any cleaning service in town! 🙂

How did you keep the little ones on task the whole time without them running away to play? 

Since they have a “trainer” (you or your older children) they do not have the option of running away or getting distracted. 

Is it too late to start at 13?

It is never too late!  However you will need to have a little “pow wow” and share your reasoning for the changes that are ahead.  I would come up with a plan for chores and then sit down with the older child or children, tell them that you have been remiss in teaching them some basic responsibilities in life and that you need to make up for lost time.  The first month I would “roll up my sleeves” and teach them (by doing it with them) to do every chore in your home.  Then I would put up a chore chart and let them take on the household responsibilities. Since they are older I would also have a clear list of consequences for not completing the chores. (and they need to be “painful” if they are going to work – ie: no cell phone privileges, no Xbox, no Internet, no weekend social activities…whatever is their “button”.)

As the kids get older and their schedules & academic pursuits get more intense how do you handle household chores?

First let me say….there are many reasons and seasons that you will need to adjust your chore plan during the years your children are home. We went along with the same schedule for years with only occasional adjustments (like during each of my pregnancies where I was sick and sometimes bed ridden and my husband got to take over the Upper Management position) but when the eldest child started a rigorous academic high school program and also joined athletics and student council we realized we needed to change things up.  That was seven years ago and we have consistently made changes since then – having a unique school year plan, weekend plan and summer plan. 

That is not to say that anyone “gets off” easy just that we move things around to make the system work better.  High School with all its additional demands and responsibilities is a great time to learn effective time management, how to handle stress, priorities, occasional sleep deprivation and that sometimes there is more to accomplish than there are hours in a day. Sounds like a typical adult life to me…and don’t we want them to be prepared and ready to handle being an adult?

Is your house clean all the time? 

Ha! Not at all….but it is usually picked up and presentable. Occasionally it is pristine.  Occassionally it looks like a tornado hit it! (and we let people come over anytime regardless of the state of our home because people are our priority)

You mentioned cooking – is that on the chore chart?

We actually have a monthly dinner calendar posted on the fridge.  It lists everything we will be having for dinner that month. Above each meal is usually listed one of the older children’s names who will be in charge of making that meal.  We spent much of the early years of parenting doing “Once a Month Cooking” and having home-made ready cooked meals in the freezer. On the cooking days the kids helped out and learned many cooking skills.  

I do believe that our children need to know basic cooking skills and how to prepare a healthy meal before they leave our home.

And what about that allowance?

Ok…so lots of you are interested in the how’s, why’s or why not’s of allowance. I promise a post on that soon!

Also, be sure to check out the comments on the first chore post for lots of other good ideas from my readers.

Lastly….I thought I would share with you one of my many “Memo from Mom” an occasional email exchange I have with the family when I have decided not to become a screaming maniac but rather calmly (albeit sarcastically) share my grievances about the household. Although I will confess sometimes I am that screaming maniac…God forgive me!

My dear darling daughters…

Seriously…..
 
Do we really spill spaghetti sauce in the fridge & then leave it there to harden & be disgusting? (of course the other amazing thing is how many other people have opened the fridge & just ignored it)
 
Can no one tell the laundry garbage can needs to be emptied even when it is overflowing & spilling out on the floor?
 
Why is the tortilla bag NEVER….and I mean NEVER zip locked shut?
 
How many times do I have to tell you that cheese must be sealed completely with foil or a tightly secured zip lock?
 
Can someone please explain to me how one can not see a dark red shirt in the middle of the whites as you are putting them in the washer?? (try to blame it on Joy cuz that will show competence)
 
Why would someone put 9 month old clothing in Daniel’s drawer (he is 3 now!)…or how bout his PJ’s in the drawer with his bathing suits…or pants in the drawer with shirts or everything just thrown in the drawer not folded…or his nice church vest in the play closet…seriously??? seriously??? seriously??? Oh wait…his tie behind the toaster…come on ladies! <sigh of exasparation>
 
Ok….that’s it, just had to vent a bit.
 
I love you all!  Zoot! Zoot! Zoot!
 
Mommy
 

 

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Filed under Life at the Lambdins, Life Lessons, Motherhood, My "take", Parenting

September 7, 2010 · 7:34 am

21 gifts of guidance for my 21 year old

How is it that I have a 21 year old daughter? I can remember so clearly my own 21st birthday – I went to my senior classes at the University of the Pacific during the day and then was joined by several college friends for a small backyard birthday barbecue at Pastor John Butrin’s home that was also the culmination of my summer internship at Lincoln Neighborhood Church. I was loving my Lord and my life, surrounded by dear friends and excited about my future plans! I can still remember that day with joy in my heart.

Today my own daughter is turning 21. She too is a young, energetic and enthusiastic student attending The King’s College in New York City. She has many good friends and will likely be celebrating her birthday tonight surrounded by those who love her. She has a bright future ahead of her and I could not be more thrilled with her character, her life choices and her commitment to her faith.

For her 21st birthday instead of a gift of “things” I want to give her my gift of guidance as she reaches this new milestone in life that here in the USA signifies a “coming of age” or adulthood. (although being the counter-culture family that we are…we have raised our children to enter adulthood much younger so in some ways this is just another birthday)

Michelle…here are 21 “gifts of guidance” from your Mom who knows that you desire to have a life that is lived to its fullness, a life that is lived well and a life that makes an impact on the world! May these 21 gifts encourage you, challenge you and inspire you to live that life!

1.  Never leave your first love – Jesus. He is the most faithful friend, the best big brother, a passionate intimate beloved and warm, loving father.

2. Never stop believing in and meditating on the inspired inerrant Word of God…even with all the facts on your side…it still takes faith.

3. Be thankful every day for the firm foundation you received growing up in a committed Christian home – it is truly an amazing blessing.

4. Let God be God…because we are not. The sooner you relinquish to Christ complete control of your life and your future the better off you will be.

5. Flee temptation…never was there a better word from God…and yet we often ignore it because sin feels good, tastes good and looks good. It never turns out to be good. Run!

6. Remember it is not the hard things that happen to you along the way that matter…it is how you respond. God is more interested in your response.

7. You will truly look back at the tough times in life and be so thankful for what they brought you…so why not just be thankful in the midst of them?

8. God wants to meet all of your needs – physical, emotional, spiritual, mental – so just let Him.

9. Do not believe it when people say “it can’t be done” or “that will never happen”  – with God all things are possible!

10. Everyday God puts divine appointments right in front of you – don’t get distracted and miss them – it is one of the greatest delights of life.

11. Give, give, and give some more….you will simply be given even more to turn around and give more! Give to everyone who asks of you – your time, your talent or your treasure!

12. Wait for a man who is passionately committed to our God and who will be a life partner and together you will do more for the kingdom of God than you could have ever accomplished alone – there is nothing better than being married to a man who shares your love for the Lord and your life purpose.

13. Worship with full abandon…sing loudly, turn up the music, dance, clap, shout, raise your hands, bow before him, pour out your heart in praise, let His creation awe and inspire you. This is what you were created for!

14. Adopt!

15. Don’t buy into Christian “worldy wisdom” on children, safety, dating & relationships, retirement, material possessions, sharing your stuff or “praying about things” that are clearly commanded to do in His word.

16. Don’t waste time in trivial pursuits – if it is not about God, relationships, people, service or ministry – do not give much of your life to it.

17. Pursue friendships with those who will encourage you, challenge your faith and take you to a deeper level. (skip the shallowness of talking to your girlfriends about where to get your nails done, how much those jeans cost, why they are mad at their husbands, shopping or the latest “void of value” TV show).

18. Be faithful and true to your word, to the body of Christ, to your marriage, to your family & friends.

19. If you see a need…meet it! (you don’t have to be “called”)

20. If you are continually looking for ways to love and serve others…you will never have time to be depressed, bored or critical.

21. Compared to eternity…life here is so very, very short. Invest your life in eternity!

To my amazing, awesome, beautiful, strong, tenacious, determined, creative, passionate, purposeful, lovely, gracious, compassionate, enthusiastic, helpful, influential, Christlike first-born daughter….Happy 21st Birthday! I love you so much Michelle-my-belle! I know that God has great plans for your life and I will be cheering you on!

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Filed under Attitude, Blessings, Faith, Inspiration, Life at the Lambdins, Life Lessons, My "take"

September 6, 2010 · 10:54 pm

Chores – “It’s a Hard Knock Life!”

This is the song often heard blasting through the CD player as my kids were doing their chores.  I guess it makes them feel better as they “slave away” for hours (their perception) completing their individual list of chores for the day.  And as a gracious Mom/Boss who has achieved “upper management” status, I simply smile and let them play it as loud as they want….as long as the job gets done! (which by the way can mostly be accomplished in much less than 1 hour)

I have been asked by many recently to share my “take” on chores and how that area of life plays out for the Lambdin family.  So…here it goes:

I am sure there are as many philosophies, ideas and plans for chores as there are families.  Some families choose to have their kids do minimal chores or even none at all…either hiring help or having Mom do most of the work (after all no one does it as good as mom does, right?). Others  attempt to have their kids take on some chores but don’t follow-up or follow through and end up fighting constantly.  Many do not take the time to train their children how to do the chore properly and then get mad when they do not “do it right”.  Some wonder if they are requiring too much or too little. And I think I can safely say that everyone that has ever lived with more than just themselves has struggled in this area of chores.

My chore philosophy:

  1. Children need to do chores. As a matter of fact everyone living together in a household should have responsibilities in that home.
  2. Children can learn many things through chores – a good work ethic, responsibility, overcoming laziness, pride at a job well done, teamwork, leadership, initiative and appreciation.  Now there is a great list of character qualities that we should all be wanting to instill in our children! (and I bet some of you in business would love to hire people with these qualities to work for you)
  3. Children are capable of beginning simple chores at a very young age (by 2 they can throw away trash, pick up toys etc..) and before the end of their first decade of life they should be competent in most household duties.
  4. My job (at least one of them as it applies to chores & raising my children) is that by the time they leave my home they have mastered all household chores. (Define all: bathrooms from top to bottom, laundry – washing, drying, folding, floors, windows, dusting, vacuuming, dishes, kitchen from top to bottom, defrosting refrigerator, cleaning out cars, weeding, lawn mowing, trash, organizing, de-cluttering, ceiling fans, blinds, simple sewing, ironing and cooking) And this goes for boy & girls…they all need to know how to do these things even if they grow up and hire it out, simply do not do it or have their spouse do it. (I rarely iron because my love is so much better at it than I am…but I do know how)
  5. It is my responsibility (because I am in upper management) to train them on how to do the job, to give clear written expectations, to follow-up and then to recognize them for a job well done.

Now with that said…there are many different seasons in family life and that means we are continually adjusting our chore charts, responsibilities and schedules as our family grows and changes.  For example when I had 4 children ages 6, 3, 18 months and a newborn the chores were mainly done by myself, my husband and my eldest daughter.  As they grew older I spent a lot of time on training.  By the time the eldest reached the age of 10, she stepped into the training role followed quickly by the younger sisters.  During the “middle years” I can honestly say I did nothing…but supervise. It was fabulous! (a well oiled machine!) I am still in that supervisory role but when the older kids began high school (that we see as the serious academic training years) then we had to adjust their chores to weekends & summertime responsibilities putting me back in a more hands on training role with the “littles”.

Ok, ok so you want to see some “practical” ideas not just to hear my theory.

Here you go:

First of all we have always had a chore chart on the refrigerator or bulletin board.  For years I had many months mapped out at a time. (and sadly I never took a photo of those charts…complete with creativity and colorful stickers!  But I assure you I could have been hired as a personnel director for a major company.)  Now we only have one month mapped out at a time because of the multitudes of directions the high schoolers are going, a college student coming home for summer & holidays and thus being added to the chore chart and my new season of having more littles at home daily than big kids.

Here is what the current chore chart looks like:

This allows everyone to easily see at any given moment who has what chore.  We have always chosen to have our kids rotate chores weekly so that they do not get “stuck” too long with an undesirable chore and so that they learn how to do each chore well with years of practice (repetition is the key to learning!). 

Now along with the chore chart calendar….we have a written list of what needs to be done within each chore assignment (complete with check off boxes for those first-born obsessive compulsives who love to check things off a list, for those “beavers” who need accuracy and to do it “right” and it even provides something to color for the free-spirited kids who colored through the entire line with a different color crayon).   There is a check list of things that needed to be done daily as well as things that only needed to be done weekly (we pick one day a week that we call “big clean up” where everything is “spic & span” – deep cleaned – and mommy loves this day!) There were even things that only needed to be done monthly and so we picked one day a month to do those specific chores.

This is what those chore lists look like (and I have this on a computer document so I can adjust and change as needed. I make dozens of copies at a time and put them in a hanging pocket holder for easy access…thus eliminating the “I didn’t know I had to do that in the bathroom” excuse) –

Bathroom

Daily

  • [ ] Toilet, counters, sink – wiped off with Clorox wipes
  • [ ] Floor swept
  • [ ] Rugs vacuumed
  • [ ] Trash emptied (both bathrooms)
  • [ ] Picked up
  • [ ] Mirrors cleaned

1x a week – big clean up

  • [ ] Toilet, Tub, Counters & sink SCRUBBED
  • [ ] Floor scrubbed (hands & knees)
  • [ ] Walls washed
  • [ ] Organize Towels
  • [ ] Clean soap container
  • [ ] Fill up cabinet with toilet paper
  • [ ] clean vase/flowers
  • [ ] Remove Cob Webs

monthly

  • [ ] Organize drawers & hair accessories

I have similar lists for the bedroom, kitchen, living room, laundry, family/school room & backyard (if you would like a copy just leave a comment and I will send you my word document)

Here is where the lists are located and how they are organized:

As the kids get older they usually no longer need a check off list but they still come in handy when they are training the “littles” or of they start slacking off and need a reminder of what they are supposed to be doing.

One more thing – we do not give our kids an allowance for doing chores (actually we do not give allowances at all…but that is for another post) as we believe everyone has a responsibility to take care of our home. We do however have a few paid opportunities that are not on anyones chore list and yet still need to be done.  They change on occasion but until our recent finacial crunch they have been: Mom & Dad’s bathroom,  the china hutch (completely emptying & cleaning), weeding, cleaning the garage.

There it is in a “nutshell”…if you have more questions (What if the kids do not do their chores? What if they are not done like you would do them? What ages do they get added to the actual chore chart?  Is my house clean?  You mentioned cooking – is that on the chore chart? Or any other question) just leave them in the comment section and I’ll answer there so everyone can read them.

And I am sure other readers as well as myself would love to hear how you handle chores in your house, helpful hints or great solutions…leave those comments as well and we can all learn from each other.

Perfect post for Labor Day thinks this Upper Management Mom!

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