Category Archives: Life Lessons

September 7, 2010 · 7:34 am

21 gifts of guidance for my 21 year old

How is it that I have a 21 year old daughter? I can remember so clearly my own 21st birthday – I went to my senior classes at the University of the Pacific during the day and then was joined by several college friends for a small backyard birthday barbecue at Pastor John Butrin’s home that was also the culmination of my summer internship at Lincoln Neighborhood Church. I was loving my Lord and my life, surrounded by dear friends and excited about my future plans! I can still remember that day with joy in my heart.

Today my own daughter is turning 21. She too is a young, energetic and enthusiastic student attending The King’s College in New York City. She has many good friends and will likely be celebrating her birthday tonight surrounded by those who love her. She has a bright future ahead of her and I could not be more thrilled with her character, her life choices and her commitment to her faith.

For her 21st birthday instead of a gift of “things” I want to give her my gift of guidance as she reaches this new milestone in life that here in the USA signifies a “coming of age” or adulthood. (although being the counter-culture family that we are…we have raised our children to enter adulthood much younger so in some ways this is just another birthday)

Michelle…here are 21 “gifts of guidance” from your Mom who knows that you desire to have a life that is lived to its fullness, a life that is lived well and a life that makes an impact on the world! May these 21 gifts encourage you, challenge you and inspire you to live that life!

1.  Never leave your first love – Jesus. He is the most faithful friend, the best big brother, a passionate intimate beloved and warm, loving father.

2. Never stop believing in and meditating on the inspired inerrant Word of God…even with all the facts on your side…it still takes faith.

3. Be thankful every day for the firm foundation you received growing up in a committed Christian home – it is truly an amazing blessing.

4. Let God be God…because we are not. The sooner you relinquish to Christ complete control of your life and your future the better off you will be.

5. Flee temptation…never was there a better word from God…and yet we often ignore it because sin feels good, tastes good and looks good. It never turns out to be good. Run!

6. Remember it is not the hard things that happen to you along the way that matter…it is how you respond. God is more interested in your response.

7. You will truly look back at the tough times in life and be so thankful for what they brought you…so why not just be thankful in the midst of them?

8. God wants to meet all of your needs – physical, emotional, spiritual, mental – so just let Him.

9. Do not believe it when people say “it can’t be done” or “that will never happen”  – with God all things are possible!

10. Everyday God puts divine appointments right in front of you – don’t get distracted and miss them – it is one of the greatest delights of life.

11. Give, give, and give some more….you will simply be given even more to turn around and give more! Give to everyone who asks of you – your time, your talent or your treasure!

12. Wait for a man who is passionately committed to our God and who will be a life partner and together you will do more for the kingdom of God than you could have ever accomplished alone – there is nothing better than being married to a man who shares your love for the Lord and your life purpose.

13. Worship with full abandon…sing loudly, turn up the music, dance, clap, shout, raise your hands, bow before him, pour out your heart in praise, let His creation awe and inspire you. This is what you were created for!

14. Adopt!

15. Don’t buy into Christian “worldy wisdom” on children, safety, dating & relationships, retirement, material possessions, sharing your stuff or “praying about things” that are clearly commanded to do in His word.

16. Don’t waste time in trivial pursuits – if it is not about God, relationships, people, service or ministry – do not give much of your life to it.

17. Pursue friendships with those who will encourage you, challenge your faith and take you to a deeper level. (skip the shallowness of talking to your girlfriends about where to get your nails done, how much those jeans cost, why they are mad at their husbands, shopping or the latest “void of value” TV show).

18. Be faithful and true to your word, to the body of Christ, to your marriage, to your family & friends.

19. If you see a need…meet it! (you don’t have to be “called”)

20. If you are continually looking for ways to love and serve others…you will never have time to be depressed, bored or critical.

21. Compared to eternity…life here is so very, very short. Invest your life in eternity!

To my amazing, awesome, beautiful, strong, tenacious, determined, creative, passionate, purposeful, lovely, gracious, compassionate, enthusiastic, helpful, influential, Christlike first-born daughter….Happy 21st Birthday! I love you so much Michelle-my-belle! I know that God has great plans for your life and I will be cheering you on!

10 Comments

Filed under Attitude, Blessings, Faith, Inspiration, Life at the Lambdins, Life Lessons, My "take"

September 6, 2010 · 10:54 pm

Chores – “It’s a Hard Knock Life!”

This is the song often heard blasting through the CD player as my kids were doing their chores.  I guess it makes them feel better as they “slave away” for hours (their perception) completing their individual list of chores for the day.  And as a gracious Mom/Boss who has achieved “upper management” status, I simply smile and let them play it as loud as they want….as long as the job gets done! (which by the way can mostly be accomplished in much less than 1 hour)

I have been asked by many recently to share my “take” on chores and how that area of life plays out for the Lambdin family.  So…here it goes:

I am sure there are as many philosophies, ideas and plans for chores as there are families.  Some families choose to have their kids do minimal chores or even none at all…either hiring help or having Mom do most of the work (after all no one does it as good as mom does, right?). Others  attempt to have their kids take on some chores but don’t follow-up or follow through and end up fighting constantly.  Many do not take the time to train their children how to do the chore properly and then get mad when they do not “do it right”.  Some wonder if they are requiring too much or too little. And I think I can safely say that everyone that has ever lived with more than just themselves has struggled in this area of chores.

My chore philosophy:

  1. Children need to do chores. As a matter of fact everyone living together in a household should have responsibilities in that home.
  2. Children can learn many things through chores – a good work ethic, responsibility, overcoming laziness, pride at a job well done, teamwork, leadership, initiative and appreciation.  Now there is a great list of character qualities that we should all be wanting to instill in our children! (and I bet some of you in business would love to hire people with these qualities to work for you)
  3. Children are capable of beginning simple chores at a very young age (by 2 they can throw away trash, pick up toys etc..) and before the end of their first decade of life they should be competent in most household duties.
  4. My job (at least one of them as it applies to chores & raising my children) is that by the time they leave my home they have mastered all household chores. (Define all: bathrooms from top to bottom, laundry – washing, drying, folding, floors, windows, dusting, vacuuming, dishes, kitchen from top to bottom, defrosting refrigerator, cleaning out cars, weeding, lawn mowing, trash, organizing, de-cluttering, ceiling fans, blinds, simple sewing, ironing and cooking) And this goes for boy & girls…they all need to know how to do these things even if they grow up and hire it out, simply do not do it or have their spouse do it. (I rarely iron because my love is so much better at it than I am…but I do know how)
  5. It is my responsibility (because I am in upper management) to train them on how to do the job, to give clear written expectations, to follow-up and then to recognize them for a job well done.

Now with that said…there are many different seasons in family life and that means we are continually adjusting our chore charts, responsibilities and schedules as our family grows and changes.  For example when I had 4 children ages 6, 3, 18 months and a newborn the chores were mainly done by myself, my husband and my eldest daughter.  As they grew older I spent a lot of time on training.  By the time the eldest reached the age of 10, she stepped into the training role followed quickly by the younger sisters.  During the “middle years” I can honestly say I did nothing…but supervise. It was fabulous! (a well oiled machine!) I am still in that supervisory role but when the older kids began high school (that we see as the serious academic training years) then we had to adjust their chores to weekends & summertime responsibilities putting me back in a more hands on training role with the “littles”.

Ok, ok so you want to see some “practical” ideas not just to hear my theory.

Here you go:

First of all we have always had a chore chart on the refrigerator or bulletin board.  For years I had many months mapped out at a time. (and sadly I never took a photo of those charts…complete with creativity and colorful stickers!  But I assure you I could have been hired as a personnel director for a major company.)  Now we only have one month mapped out at a time because of the multitudes of directions the high schoolers are going, a college student coming home for summer & holidays and thus being added to the chore chart and my new season of having more littles at home daily than big kids.

Here is what the current chore chart looks like:

This allows everyone to easily see at any given moment who has what chore.  We have always chosen to have our kids rotate chores weekly so that they do not get “stuck” too long with an undesirable chore and so that they learn how to do each chore well with years of practice (repetition is the key to learning!). 

Now along with the chore chart calendar….we have a written list of what needs to be done within each chore assignment (complete with check off boxes for those first-born obsessive compulsives who love to check things off a list, for those “beavers” who need accuracy and to do it “right” and it even provides something to color for the free-spirited kids who colored through the entire line with a different color crayon).   There is a check list of things that needed to be done daily as well as things that only needed to be done weekly (we pick one day a week that we call “big clean up” where everything is “spic & span” – deep cleaned – and mommy loves this day!) There were even things that only needed to be done monthly and so we picked one day a month to do those specific chores.

This is what those chore lists look like (and I have this on a computer document so I can adjust and change as needed. I make dozens of copies at a time and put them in a hanging pocket holder for easy access…thus eliminating the “I didn’t know I had to do that in the bathroom” excuse) –

Bathroom

Daily

  • [ ] Toilet, counters, sink – wiped off with Clorox wipes
  • [ ] Floor swept
  • [ ] Rugs vacuumed
  • [ ] Trash emptied (both bathrooms)
  • [ ] Picked up
  • [ ] Mirrors cleaned

1x a week – big clean up

  • [ ] Toilet, Tub, Counters & sink SCRUBBED
  • [ ] Floor scrubbed (hands & knees)
  • [ ] Walls washed
  • [ ] Organize Towels
  • [ ] Clean soap container
  • [ ] Fill up cabinet with toilet paper
  • [ ] clean vase/flowers
  • [ ] Remove Cob Webs

monthly

  • [ ] Organize drawers & hair accessories

I have similar lists for the bedroom, kitchen, living room, laundry, family/school room & backyard (if you would like a copy just leave a comment and I will send you my word document)

Here is where the lists are located and how they are organized:

As the kids get older they usually no longer need a check off list but they still come in handy when they are training the “littles” or of they start slacking off and need a reminder of what they are supposed to be doing.

One more thing – we do not give our kids an allowance for doing chores (actually we do not give allowances at all…but that is for another post) as we believe everyone has a responsibility to take care of our home. We do however have a few paid opportunities that are not on anyones chore list and yet still need to be done.  They change on occasion but until our recent finacial crunch they have been: Mom & Dad’s bathroom,  the china hutch (completely emptying & cleaning), weeding, cleaning the garage.

There it is in a “nutshell”…if you have more questions (What if the kids do not do their chores? What if they are not done like you would do them? What ages do they get added to the actual chore chart?  Is my house clean?  You mentioned cooking – is that on the chore chart? Or any other question) just leave them in the comment section and I’ll answer there so everyone can read them.

And I am sure other readers as well as myself would love to hear how you handle chores in your house, helpful hints or great solutions…leave those comments as well and we can all learn from each other.

Perfect post for Labor Day thinks this Upper Management Mom!

42 Comments

Filed under Life at the Lambdins, Life Lessons, My "take", Parenting

August 25, 2010 · 12:34 am

A Lesson Plan for Life

Can someone please tell me when the month of August ceased being summertime?  I am becoming a militant mom on a “save our summer” campaign as it seems summer break is getting shorter and shorter each year.

Isn’t August still a time for being a “floatin’ fool in the swimming pool”, savoring backyard barbecues with friends, attending carnivals, state fairs & baseball games, sipping ice coffee & having conversations on the patio in the cool of the evening after a sweltering day, enjoying late night ice cream sundaes in front of a newly rented movie and sleeping in as late as you want in the morning! It is truly the best of the “dog days of summer” …no schedules, no agenda…just enjoying the easy living of summer!

A few photos of what we have been doing this week!

These days summer seems to come to a screeching halt by the end of July as more and more schools are choosing early start dates instead of the traditional day after Labor Day, 1st day of school. My life has been affected by this evolution….with dear darling hubby working at an educational institution that began August 10 along with three of my daughters who attend there, the charter school I homeschool through following suit, soccer practices already in full swing for the fall season & even the local neighborhood pool cutting back their hours to weekends & “after school” (even though its 100+ degrees outside today!). It has even dampened my September 1st birthday celebration that always fell during the last week of summer vacation with no worries, no school, no homework. (and I didn’t care about missing out on cupcakes in the classroom…I’d take a vacation time birthday over that anytime!) Yes, in my perfect world …it is and should still be – Summertime – with all its many wonderful diversions!

So, since I refuse to conform to this “new” definition of August…for us this marks the last week of summertime before school starts.  Which means it is a time to continue to enjoy the last lazy days of summer while at the same time beginning to form a plan and prepare for the upcoming school year.

Having personally been entrenched in the education world for over 24 years (11 years as a high school teacher & administrator and the past 13 years as a home school teacher)… I always see this time of year as a new beginning much like the time right before the new calendar year in January.  A fresh start to a brand new school year that I can make into whatever I want it to be.  The past school year, with all its failures, mistakes as well as successes,  is over and gone, only to be remembered through report cards, school records and the scrapbook or yearbook.

I always loved that fresh start feeling! I had an empty lesson planner and a school year calendar sitting blank in front of me and I could create whatever type of year I wanted. I could continue to fine tune & develop the things that were successful and make them even better. I could throw out things that were not working so well. I could try brand new, perhaps even “risky” ideas in hopes of inspiring my students in their quest of learning.  As I sat there with my yearly calendar, my goals & objectives and my weekly lesson plans…the sky was the limit! I could accomplish anything that new school year.

But one thing was always certain….I never started a new school year without a “plan”.  And none of us would accept our child’s teacher telling us that they had no specific plan for the year – no goals or objectives – that they were just going let things happen.  No, we would leave that classroom (in shock!) and head  straight to the office to demand a new teacher!  

YET…that is exactly what many of us do with our lives.  We just “let it happen” without any goals & objectives and with very little planning and then we wonder why it’s not working” for us? I want to challenge you today to begin to make a plan for your life this “school year”. Forget the past…and make this year a fresh new start.  And my first suggestion would be to…

…Begin with the end in mind!

Well, maybe not the very end (although that’s an excellent way to live….thinking about what you want your life to have looked like when you are on your death bed!) Let’s start with this –  Next August in 2011, what do you want your life to look like? 

  • What personal or family habits do you want to cultivate?
  • What new traditions do you want to establish or new ways to celebrate life?
  • What do you want to teach your children?
  • What do you want for your marriage and/or family relationships?
  • Do you have any new skills you want to acquire or talents you want to improve upon or use?
  • Where do you want to be spiritually, physically, emotionally, mentally & financially?

After you write out your dreams, goals, objectives…..take each of them and make a list of what needs to happen to accomplish them. Then “calendar” those things into your year and write out your  daily, weekly & monthly “life lesson plan”. 

Here is an example of what that could look like –

Goal: To get caught up & stay current on my family photo albums

Ways to accomplish this:  weekly time set aside to journal, monthly workshops, yearly retreats

What to put on the life lesson plan & on the calendar: 

  • Weekly: Journaling time every Sunday afternoon for 1 hour
  • Monthly: First Friday of the month attend a 4 hour workshop to complete albums
  • Bi-Annually: Every October & February go on a scrapbooking weekend retreat with friends.

Here is a “heavier” example

Goal: The family to grow spiritually over the next year.

What needs to happen to accomplish this: church involvement, regular family prayer & devotions, scripture memory, cultivating personal time with God, becoming missions minded, developing meaningful spiritual traditions around the holidays etc…

What to put on the life lesson plan & on the calendar:

  • Daily or Regularly –  
  1. Provide a “quiet time” at home (even if it is just 15 minutes) for cultivating a relationship with God thru the word & personal prayer & meditation.
  2. Decide on best time for family prayer & devotions and make it happen. (even if you begin with once or twice a week rather than daily)
  3. Pick a verse to begin memorizing and post it around the house (bathroom mirrors, fridge, car dash board etc..) – practice together daily at a family meal or while driving to school.
  • Weekly 
  1. Calendar in weekly church attendance  – Sundays and or week night youth or prayer services
  2. Do a weekly family Bible study together
  • Monthly or Quarterly:
  1.  a mission trip or other local outreach opportunity (like working at a local soup kitchen or passing out blankets to the homeless)
  2. Research making holidays meaningful & implement one thing to each holiday this year. (for ideas & inspiration for holiday and other meaningful family traditions you can look at my blog here and here and here)
  3. Have a monthly time of family communion (read about this here)

And one more example – since the #1 post on this blog (11,500 views) has to do with improving your marriage (taking the love dare challenge) let me give you a sample there too.

Goal: To improve our marriage and have greater communication, deeper friendship and renew passion

What things need to be accomplished to meet this goal: setting aside time to talk and pray together, going on regular date nights, looking for ways to serve one another, loving each other in the way they need to be loved, reading, learning & growing in our marriage skills, romantic weekends away

What to put on the life lesson plan & calendar:

  • Daily –  
  1. Pray together each morning or evening while in bed (no distractions)
  2. Don’t leave each other each day without an “I love you” & goodbye kiss
  3. Greet one another upon returning home with an “I love you” &  hello kiss
  • Weekly 
  1. Have a “coffee & conversation” time each week…perhaps on Sunday night before a new week begins to discuss both the good and bad of life, whats on your plate for the upcoming week and any other issues needing to be discussed
  2. Do one thing each week to purposely fill the love tank of your spouse (you would need to read The Five Love Languages by Gary Smalley to really understand this…but basically you are choosing to love them they way they want to be loved…I think I will write another blog about this because I feel a plan brewing)
  • Monthly:
  1. Date Night…special time out alone…looking great…just like the pre marriage dating days!
  • Yearly
  1. Attend a marriage conference or read a book together to improve relationship (even if it is good!)
  2. Go away for a romantic weekend together (or longer if you can pull it off!)
  3. Celebrate your anniversary every year (which is when we take our romantic get-aways!) 

 So as your summer winds down & the new school year begins – stop and take the time to write out your dreams & goals for this year. Make a life lesson plan & then put that plan into action and on the calendar! (In my house our motto is: If it is on the calendar…it happens!) Don’t continue to just let life “happen”  but rather “Make it happen”.  You will reap great rewards for your efforts.

Here’s to August 2011 when as you are enjoying the “dog days of summer” basking in the sun by the pool, you’ll also enjoy looking back at your many accomplishments of the past year & basking in the glory of a year well lived.

2 Comments

Filed under Goals & Dreams, Life Lessons, Marriage

August 19, 2010 · 8:35 pm

My deepest desires

Today I cried.

Ok, so actually I cry easily – most every Sunday during worship, while watching movies, videos or commercials with anything that is the slightest bit touching, as I speak about things I am passionate about, watching a child be born, at baptisms, graduations, weddings & funerals and yes, even when the National Anthem is being played at ballgames.  It is true! Ask my kids who are constantly looking over to see if Mom is getting weepy again at any given moment.  I probably “tear up” almost daily.

But today was different.  Today was one of those heart wrenching, sobbing, deep from within cries that hit me like a brick.  I suppose it was a culmination of things – dealing with “tough love” issues with friends that didn’t go so well,  facing some hard realities about our upcoming financial changes, being overly tired from a pretty jam-packed schedule of late nights, early mornings and excessive driving, feeling inadequate, under appreciated and unaccepted by people who are important to me and of course hormones that are raging at this moment in life!

I found myself face down on my bed, sobbing into my pillow and feeling crushed under the weight of emotion.  It has been a very long time since I have cried with such intensity over my own life.  In fact, as I thought about it I can count on one hand the times that I have truly broken down and wept like that:

  • The death of my beloved father
  • A shocking betrayal by longtime trusted friends
  • The end of a dear friends marriage
  • My daughter’s diagnosis of Type 1 diabetes

And I am truly grateful that my life has not included some of the tragic events that can bring you to your knees in total all consuming grief.  And yet despite not having a specific tragedy in my life, I was grieving something deep in my heart today.  After the tears subsided leaving me with very red eyes, a runny nose and puffy face and I was able to spend some time contemplating my emotional state and searching my heart for the reasons behind my inexplicable “cry-out”, I realized that it came down to three things:

  1. I want to be loved unconditionally –  don’t we all?  Is not every heart longing to be loved in a deep satisfying way?  We look for this love throughout our entire lives. We look for it first in our parents, then from our friends and in that “perfect” relationship with a spouse that is destined to be our soul mate. I don’t want to earn it or deserve it, I just want to be loved. Sacrificial, committed, perfect love.
  2. I want to be accepted for who I am – the good, the bad and the ugly.  I am who I am.  Not that I will ever stop trying to be a better person, smooth out my flaws or improve my character. Nor do I want to ever cease growing into the best version of myself.  Yet again, I am who I am.  I have been given a personality with both strengths and weaknesses.  I have been given gifts and talents as well as struggles and challenges. I have done some great things with my life as well as my share of evil and ungodly actions. I want to be accepted just the way I am with all my failings and imperfections.
  3. I want my needs to be provided for.  Now, maybe this is a girl thing, I do not know, but at times I just want to be taken care of. I want to be as free as a child who knows that all of her daily needs will be met by her parents.  I want to be provided for not to always work, struggle or contend.  I want a caretaker, a personal assistant, a cook, a maid, a masseuse……ok not really my “needs” but you get the idea.  To live a life free of striving.

Can anyone else out there relate to these desires?  I think you just might.  I believe that we all have similar desires in our lives.  What surprised me as I analyzed my break down was how deep these desires resonated with me even though I am surrounded by those who love me, accept me and take care of me. How could I feel these needs so deeply when:

  • I had parents growing up who showered us with unconditional love and provided for our every need
  • I have an abundance of family members who would do most anything for me
  • I have always been blessed with deep and meaningful friendships with many people throughout my life
  • I have a handful of close friends who are constantly reaching out to provide things to make my life better
  • I have simply the most amazing husband ever who loves me through everything and works hard to take care of me
  • I have eight children who pour love into my life, accept my imperfections and love to call me their Mom

With all that love and acceptance how could I still have those deep desires?

Is it because God has put the desire in my heart that only He can completely meet?  No one else can truly love me with a sacrificial and unconditional love.  No one else can really accept me…warts and all….just the way I am.  No one else can provide for all of my needs.  Only God and God alone can touch the depths of my heart and fill me to overflowing.

I know that.

I have lived that.

I have shared that with others.

But perhaps today I needed to feel the emotions of deeply desiring that love, acceptance and provision so I could allow Him to once again draw me close into His loving arms.  Now I just need to stay there!

6 Comments

Filed under Attitude, Faith, Life Lessons, Lifes Challenges

August 10, 2010 · 10:33 am

Here’s to the good times! (and even the bad)

My fourth daughter began high school today <sigh> and as is my tradition I wrote her a letter for her first day of school. Having just returned from my own 30th high school class reunion and also entering a new season of life myself, I had many thoughts rolling around in my head about high school and life’s journey that made there way into this letter.  

Dear Rebekah (Bop!)

Today is the big day…your first day of high school (and your first day of actually going to a school building with “real” teachers, schedules and tardy bells)  I know you are excited and full of anticipation and perhaps even apprehension for what these four years may hold for you… 

  • new friendships to be made
  • life lessons to be learned
  • exciting new experiences
  • school camps & chapel services
  • athletic competition & team sports
  • social events in abundance
  • clubs, community service & extra curricular activities
  • drivers license procured
  • leadership opportunities
  • making memories that will last a lifetime
  • good times!

I pray that these four years are filled with all of these things and more. I hope that you will take advantage of every opportunity available to you…that you will hold nothing back and jump in to high school life without fear or apprehension.  It will go by so fast and before you know it, you will be graduating and beginning another new season of life. Do not waste even a minute of your high school years! Savor each & every moment.

On the other side, life is also full of unexpected and often unwanted experiences, twists and turns.  As we stand at the threshold of this new season of life it is good to stop and think of what the four years may hold that could possibly bring hurt, anger or even great sorrow to our lives…

  • rejection, isolation or being hurt by others
  • being the subject of ridicule, gossip or slander
  • unfair or unjust treatment by those in authority
  • persecution for your faith
  • financial constraints that prevent you from doing or having something you want
  • being uprooted from your home and having to begin again in a new place
  • a life altering injury or accident
  • dealing with sickness or disease yourself or with a friend or family member
  • losing a loved one – perhaps a dear friend or family member

Yes, it is sobering to think of all the hardships, (and you may be thinking sarcastically….”Wow, Mom what an encouraging letter…not!”) but these are realities of life that you may be faced with during high school.  Certainly however, you will face many of them in your lifetime and I want you to take sometime to consider how we should live our lives both during the good times and the bad.

In the Good Times

While in general during the good seasons of life we are happy and content, it is easy during these seasons to get complacent, ungrateful and even critical.  We get complacent with our relationships with God, our family and even in our friendships.  We can become ungrateful for all that we have been given and even come to expect to be given life on a “silver platter”.  We often are critical of others as we become more and more self centered during seasons of smooth sailing.

I want to encourage you during this current “good season” of life to develop a deeper relationship with God than you ever have before, don’t wait until the storms of life come to draw near to Him.  Cling closely to your family.  You have been blessed with an “intact” loving Christ centered home and have many sisters and a brother who love you as well as parents who would lay down their lives for you.  Do not take that for granted. In four short years (and yes they will be short) you will potentially be out of the house and perhaps never again have the day to day interaction and opportunities you have now to enjoy the family you have been blessed with.  Develop friendships that will last a lifetime by centering them on the only thing that lasts – Jesus Christ!  Have Bible studies together, talk about the deep things of life, pray together, encourage one another to do well and enjoy the fruit of love & joy (and lots of laughter) as you make meaningful memories during your high school experience.

Always be grateful for all that you have been given – and you my dear daughter have been given much!  You have been blessed with intelligence, creativity, communication & organization skills, leadership, influence, athletic ability, tenacity, strength, drive and beauty.  You have also been given life, health, family, friends and most importantly – God the Father, God the Son & God the Holy Spirit.  Do not become ungrateful for the many gifts you have been given.  Thank the Lord for each new day and use your gifts and talents for His glory!

Do not be critical. You can’t help what you might feel or think when dealing with other people – your parents, sisters, brother, friends, teachers, youth pastors, and school administrators but you can decide how you will react and what you will speak out of your mouth. A critical spirit is so ugly and will ultimately only destroy you.  Speak positively. Offer positive alternatives. Talk with those (not about those) who you are feeling critical towards “behind closed doors” about your complaints (NOT to others…unless you want to get advice from Mom & Dad). Pray for them.

And lastly during the good times…enjoy life. Don’t whine or stress over the little things. 

In the Bad Times

You have heard me say so often…”It is not what happens to you in life that matters, it is how you respond”   God is looking for a proper response to the trials, tribulations, sorrows & hardships of this life.

Do not be surprised if some of the hardships I listed above come your way over the course of your high school experience.  You can actually count on it! (joyful thought, I know!)  The Bible does not say “If “ you experience trials & tribulations but “when”.  Yes, you will have trials, rejection, humiliation, sorrow and hardships.  So be ready!

How will you respond Rebekah?

  • Will you run to God to be your “everything” when you are rejected, set apart or isolated from others?
  • Will you respond with love & forgiveness when you are hurt or treated unkindly?
  • Will you trust God to be your “lawyer” when you are treated unfairly or when things are unjust?
  • Will you believe that God will provide all of your needs according to His riches in glory when financial stresses come your way?
  • Will you love those who do not love you & pray for those who persecute you?
  • Will you trust & believe that God has a perfect plan for your life and that He will lead, guide & instruct you even when the road is hard or it is a path you did not want to take?
  • Will you believe He is able to do abundantly more than you could ever ask or think and that He is the great Physician & Healer for those who may be injured or sick in body?
  • Will you trust that the Lord is good and sovereign even if you lose a loved one?
  • Will you say “Blessed be the Name of the Lord” even if He takes away from you the most precious things in your life?
  • Will you run to God and not away from Him in the midst of the trials that come your way?
  • Will you serve the Lord….no matter what happens in your life?

These are good questions for us all to consider and decide in advance of the “bad times” in life how we will respond.

Rebekah, here’s to both the “good times” & the “bad times” that are ahead of you during these high school years. Cherish, appreciate and take advantage of the good times and respond in a Christ like way to the bad times so that He can “turn your mourning into dancing”, “make beauty from ashes” & use those experiences to mold you, shape you and change your life in such a way that you will look back at both the good & the bad with great joy!

I love you Rebekah more than I can express in words.  You are so very much like me in many, many ways (I know you hate hearing that!) and yet so far beyond what I ever was as a freshman in high school.  I am proud of you and honored to be chosen to be your Mom.  I can’t wait to see the big things that God has for you in this life.

As you begin high school today… “May the Lord bless you, keep you, make His face to shine upon you, be gracious unto you and give you peace”

Zoot! Zoot! Zoot!

Mom

PS – I will miss having you here at home “running the show” although I won’t miss you trying to boss me around! 🙂

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Filed under Attitude, Life Lessons, Lifes Challenges, Motherhood

July 30, 2010 · 9:24 pm

The Voices Inside My Head

Several months ago I wrote a post about my hearts desire – to minister to others through speaking and writing. At the time I was trying to get a scholarship to attend “She Speaks”, a special conference designed specifically for Christian speakers and writers.  In order to be considered for that scholarship you had to write a blog post, so in the midst of a crazy time of life, I stopped and wrote this post – No Time Like the Present.  And no, I did not get one of the scholarships but through a strange turn of events and the generosity of a few friends I found myself on an airplane this week flying across the country to attend this conference.

As I arrived this morning I was in a very abnormal melancholy mood. I felt like I was surrounded by a cloud as I picked up my registration packet, mingled with other conference attenders and got ready to attend the first of many sessions and workshops.  It was especially odd to me as I had been beyond thrilled to have this opportunity to attend this conference and glean everything possible from the wealth of knowledge and experience that would surround me.  I shrugged it off as missing my husband and kids or having to get up early (I am simply not a morning person).

A bit later in the morning I began to have some impressions and voices in my head saying over and over again:

  • “What are you doing here?”
  • “You have nothing of any importance to say?”
  • “No one will ever ask you to come speak or be interested in reading a book you write”
  • “Who are you to think you should speak or write” (and an additional dig…”you can’t even write consistently on your blog”)

Strange voices indeed for Beth Lambdin.  You see I am not use to hearing voices like that.  I have a pretty good recording in my head, thanks to my parents that continually spoke words like this as I was growing up:

  • “You are beautiful, talented, smart & creative”
  • “You can do anything you set your heart & mind to do”
  • “You were created by God to do great things”

And since I believe the Bible to be the absolute truth & have committed many scriptures to memory I also hear these words in my head often:

  • You are the apple of God’s eye, the salt of the earth & the light of the world
  • You are fearfully & wonderfully made, a new creation in Christ
  • You are chosen of God, holy & dearly loved
  • You can do all things through Jesus Christ who gives you strength
  • You are called by God & anointed to preach

And despite this great foundation, for a moment I was seriously meditating on those defeating and discouraging thoughts. However, as the foreign voices & words came faster and faster I almost laughed out loud in the middle of the session. Wow! It hit me like a brick!  What a SURE sign this was that the enemy of my soul was not happy that I was at this conference.  I immediately silenced his condemnation with a prayer in Jesus name and sat up straight and began to write with gusto all that was being spoken about from the podium. I got extremely excited to think about what God had for me this weekend that caused Satan to bother to  try to throw such trash into my head.  The cloud lifted and the mood dissolved instantly.

I was able to be alert and ready to receive ideas and inspiration throughout the entire day and I felt reenergized and infused with faith, hope and vision for my life. (and there are still two days left!) Later that evening the speaker reminded us all that according to Ephesians Chapter 6 we are in a spiritual battle and that Satan has no business in this place, another confirmation that my experience earlier in the day was an attack.

The last speaker of the evening besides being incredibly inspirational ended his message with a short prayer that caused me to smile from ear to ear. He had us repeat it out loud after him and it went something like this…”Beloved Lord, Let me always speak the truth about what I am….I am wonderful! Amen”  Yet another layer of God’s truth speaking to my heart!

As I got into my rental car tonight to head back to my accommodations, God decided to give me one more reminder of the truth of who I am and what I can do for Him as this song began playing the moment I turned on the car:

Isn’t God just so good? Perhaps someone reading this post is also being plagued with discouraging, defeating or negative thoughts today. Maybe you too are needing a fresh reminder of who you really are. And I am confident that someone needs to be reminded that they are in a spiritual battle! (No those voices of rejection, discouragement & defeat are not your own!)  Stop listening to the enemy and the lies and speak the truth from God’s word about everything you are, all that you will become and the great things you will do! Fight the good fight of faith…you will win!

“For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh, but mighty before God to the casting down of strongholds, casting down imaginations, and every high thing that is exalted against the knowledge of God, and bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ”   2 Corinthians 10:4-5

Off to bed excited and anticipating all that is in store for me tomorrow on day two of the “She Speaks” conference.  More later…..

8 Comments

Filed under Faith, Life Lessons, Positive Words

June 29, 2010 · 9:46 am

Where is your treasure?

Do you want the good news or the bad news first?

Ok the bad news first:  It appears that we may soon hit another downturn in our personal financial situation.  With an anticipated upcoming job change our  income will be reduced by 40% in the coming months. (yes, you read that correctly 40%…and no it has nothing to do with the economy)  Since we already live pay check to pay check, needless to say this is a pretty big deal for our family financial situation.

The good news?: I am not stressed. I am not worried. I am not fearful. (and no, I am not lying!)  While a very occasional twinge of  “oh my…what are we going to do” pops up in my heart (and I know that is not God’s voice), I have a complete peace & trust in the Lord who was and is and always will be in control of my life. 

I have not always had this type of peace about finances. In fact over half my adult life was spent worrying, fretting and continually stressing about money…primarily the lack of it.  Instead of trusting the Lord to provide (as He always did), I was in a constant state of trying to “figure out” how our family could continue to be in the full-time ministry of Christian education and survive. (where the pay is often at or just above the federal poverty guidelines…now while I personally think this is unacceptable and a sad commentary on the value placed on those who serve our children and the Lord as Christian school teachers, mentors & administrators,  the weight of that responsibility will fall onto those board members & leaders who have been entrusted these institutions and I have chosen to leave that in their hands instead of whining, complaining or walking away in frustration  from the ministry God has called us to).

It actually took a major financial fallout for me to even begin to surrender this area of finances to the Lord.  Thirteen years ago we lost 100% of our income and I was completely overwhelmed with stress, worry and fear. I knew in my head what God’s word said about His provision but when it came right down to it, my heart did not truly believe.  It was during these very rough years (and there were several of them) that I  began to really believe that God alone was my provider…no matter who wrote the check! I experienced His provision in miraculous ways. I also learned many lessons & principles:

  • the difference between needs and wants (God promises to provide our needs)
  • humility, perseverance & patience
  • making memories & showing love is more lasting than any birthday or Christmas gift you give
  • children are better served & more appreciative when they pay their own way
  • don’t try to always figure it all out!

Since that time we have had years of prosperity (at least by our definition…we got to go out to a restaurant on date night instead of walking the Costco aisles & enjoying the samples!) thanks to the Lord blessing my home business venture for a season.  We have also had several cycles of  financial strain but each time my faith and trust grew stronger.  I now no longer just say out of my mouth  I trust in God to provide….I truly believe it in my heart.

In the past month since we became aware of this potential financial challenge looming ahead, we have had an unusual amount of opportunities to give money – to students going on short term missions this summer, to our pastor as a retirement gift, to JECHS for student scholarships, to a family who is in dire need of formula & diapers, to helping with adoption expenses for others.  In the past during financial struggles, while we have never completely stopped giving, we did seriously limit what we gave.  However this month I have just decided to “carry on” in our giving as if nothing had changed.  In fact I decided to go farther than that and give something to every need I was presented. Wow!  God was once again bringing me to an even new level of trusting Him (just when ya think you have arrived!)

Yesterday I had an experience that touched my heart deeply & caused me to come to an even greater understanding of how God wants me to view finances.  I jumped onto facebook for a quick update on my friends and read about a young South African gal who herself has come from a life of poverty and through the generosity of others was attending a discipleship training school with YWAM and yet was in need of several thousand dollars to attend the outreach part of the program in Haiti. I purposed in my heart to give to this young lady and decided to ask the “big” girls if any of them wanted to chip in….only Kristen was home at the time and she had just minutes prior finished a baby sitting job. After hearing the need she handed me the entire amount she received for 2 hours of childcare. It touched my heart that she without any hesitation would be willing to bless someone that she did not even know.  I gratefully thanked the Lord for all of our financial hardships along the way because they caused us to often be the ones in need of help or at times raise support for family missions trips and to adopt our sweet baby girl.  The result of us often being in need surely has developed a heart of giving to those in need in my own children. I can’t even put a value on that benefit of our financial struggles.  As the rest of the girls arrived home, not surprisingly  they each choose to chip in to help this girl get to Haiti. My joy overflowed! And yet there is more….several hours later my seven year old daughter, Joy came up to me with her fists clinched full of change and said, “Mommy, I want to help too…here is everything I have.”  Be still my heart!  At that moment I had a revelation from God.

Joy gave all that she had because:

1. She completely trusts her Mom & Dad to provide for all her needs now & in the future (just as I need to completely trust God, my Father to provide for all my needs)

2. She knows that her family (ie: big sisters) will bless her with “extra’s” if she is wanting an icee at the swim meet or to go to the movies with the sisters (just as we all should count on one another in the church, the body of Christ to share our things , give to those in need and bless one another)

3. She did not think about what she was giving up but rather about who she was helping & giving too. She was so happy to be a “giver”. (Lord, help me to always be generous  & joyful in my giving to those in need)

4. She gave it all! (and we have a hard time giving 10%, 20%, 30%…yes I was convicted)

I was reminded of this verse in Matthew 6:19

“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”

Her sweet heart is full of God, her family & others…so that is where she put her treasure. Today as I send off a check, each of my daughters will have sent a portion of their treasure to further God’s kingdom in Haiti through a young poor (in riches but not in spirit) South African girl.

Where is your treasure going today?

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Filed under Attitude, Blessings, Economics, Faith, Life at the Lambdins, Life Lessons, Lifes Challenges

June 13, 2010 · 5:24 pm

Overwhelm them with love & appreciation

“And now, friends, we ask you to honor those leaders who work so hard for you, who have been given the responsibility of urging and guiding you along in your obedience. Overwhelm them with appreciation and love!”  1 Thessalonians 5:12-13

Tonight we will attend a very special service for the pastor who has served our home church, Lakeview Assembly of God, for over 22 years! (from 1975-1983 and then again from 1993 – 2009)  We do not attend Sunday evening service on a regular basis (this has been a purposeful decision on our part not just a haphazard “we don’t feel like going” thing – that is another blog post) but tonight we will be there to honor this very special man and his wife who committed over two decades to pastoring, teaching, counseling and ministering to our church and our family. Pastor Kraft is one of  four men who have been my pastor since I have made Lakeview my home over 27 years ago.

I was not a member during his first term at Lakeview. I began attending shortly after he moved to Washington to pastor a church there, yet I benefited from the countless people whose lives he touched during that era – men like Dr. Cliff Kelly, Donnie Moore, Tim Ditmore & Tom Cudd who each had a profound influence at different seasons of my life.  He also laid the foundation for a season of prosperity and growth for that small church he left behind.  During those years I became a member of this church, was a youth intern, the youth pastor for 4 years, got married, had two children and was a part of seeing the church move from a small run down building on Porter Way to the property we now reside in on Quail Lakes Drive and then expand the building to double its size in cooperation with my then employer, Brookside Christian High School.  Pastor John Butrin took over the baton from Pastor Kraft and then passed it on to Pastor Chan Keith. It was a season of great growth & excitement for the church.

When he returned to pastor our church in 1993 he got to “ride the wave” of growth and blessings  for awhile and then things got tough…moral failures of staff, poor financial decisions, conflict between members, anger, law suits, negative press and more seemed to plague the church and its members over the years and took its toll on many causing them to leave the church.  However despite it all great things happened as well…many people were saved during his tenure as pastor, the spirit of worship always prevailed over the services, his openness and encouragement of the gifts of the Spirit allowed many to experience the miraculous and others to step out in faith and begin ministries of their own. 

Personally he has added value to my life in many many ways.

  • He always had a kind word and a smile for me
  • His life of godly living & purity was a fine example to me and my family
  • He was always there to listen to problems and pray you through, never claiming to have all the answers or a solution
  • He was humble (a character quality sadly lacking in many leaders today) & always approachable
  • He loved the Lord and His church and that is contagious
  • He dedicated 6 of my children to the Lord!

 There are hundreds of believers throughout this area and beyond whose lives were touched while attending Lakeview Assembly under Pastor Kraft’s leadership who should be there tonight to honor him and yet….. chances are they won’t be in attendance.  They will either not be aware of this service or perhaps be busy elsewhere or even ministering at other churches and unable to attend.  Some will be too busy or others just plain not interested in honoring this man. (as anyone who has been in ministry for any length of time knows there are always those who just do not like the pastor or leader and let their feelings lead them instead of obeying God’s word to honor them…ouch…sorry if I stepped on your toes!)  Many will think kind thoughts or say a prayer of thanksgiving but will not actually take the time or energy to “overwhelm them with love & appreciation”.   Unfortunately this seems to be the case at most churches across the country, a lack of love and appreciation for those in the ministry.  More often we are quicker with our criticism and complaints than we are with our love & appreciation.  And sadly we often wait until someone is gone before we share our words of  thankfulness and love.

My hope & prayer is that everyone reading this blog will take the time to share their appreciation & love in an overwhelming way to their current pastor as well as previous pastors or leaders of ministries that have served them.  And not just the “perfect pastors” or the ones you particularly liked or “clicked with”  or always agreed with, but each one who has led or served you in ministry. They have all helped in different ways to move you closer to the Lord. Overwhelm them today!

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Filed under Attitude, Life Lessons, My "take"

May 18, 2010 · 3:59 pm

You asked for it….my God inspired love story

The past few days have been spent sharing with my husbands Bible Classes at Jim Elliot Christian High School.  He is  currently teaching a section on dating, relationships & marriage and had asked me to come and share my personal life story and philosophy. Over the years many have asked me to share my story and recently a JECHS alumni asked if I could write it down for her to share with others.  So here you go! 

I began with my experience as a “typical” high school student…in many ways just like them (minus cell phones, the Internet & facebook).  I was actively involved in sports, student council, music, my church youth group and more.  I had many friends and enjoyed a very full social life.  I began a relationship with a young man during my freshman year in high school that despite many ups & downs persevered throughout all of my high school years, to both of our detriment.  Having both been raised in church, while we had the appearance of being “good” Christian young people, our hearts were far from Godly pursuits. During the summer before my senior year in high school I had an encounter with God that took my love for Him to a new height and began a personal journey of faith that continues to this day.  I knew that the relationship I was in was a stumbling block to me in many ways and I felt that still small voice of God in my heart telling me that it needed to end.  So with a faith and trust in God I sat down with this young man who I had given my heart to and ended the relationship of more than two years.  I wish I could have told the students that from that point on there was “nothing but blue skies” as I joyfully spent my senior year in high school serving the Lord and growing in grace, knowledge, wisdom and service.  But unfortunately, while there were many wonderful things about that year…because I kept going back on my decision to not be in that relationship (in fact I think we did the break up & make up thing several times that year)…we both suffered many devastating consequences.  The relationship did finally come to a final and troubling end just weeks before my high school graduation.

As a result of that high school experience combined with a growing passion for the Lord and commitment to my faith I began to formulate a dating philosophy.  After my first year at UOP followed by a very impactful summer serving at Hume Lake Christian Camp where I spent time in prayer as well as watching others date and go in & out of relationships, I made a commitment to a “season of singleness” in my life when I decided to no longer date but to give myself exclusively to seeking & serving the Lord while waiting for Him to bring me the perfect match.  The Lord gave me this scripture during that time in my life – 

But I want you to be free from concern; One who is unmarried is concerned about the things of the Lord, how he may please the Lord, but one who is married is concerned about the things of the world, how he may please his wife and his interests are divided.

The woman who is unmarried, is concerned about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and spirit; but one who is married is concerned about the things of the world, how she may please her husband.

This I say for your own benefit; not to put a restraint upon you, but to promote what is appropriate and to secure undistracted devotion to the Lord.

1 Corinthians 7:32-35

I wanted to be wholly undistracted & devoted to the Lord and I committed myself to seeking Him & Him alone and forsaking all other dating or intimate relationships until He clearly told me it was time! I desired that the next person I dated would be the man that I would marry.

That decision to not date resulted in four years of developing an intimate relationship with the Lord where He became my “everything” and I grew more into the person He wanted me to become.  I was able to fully serve others and led many close friends to the Lord as well as becoming a full-time youth pastor ministering to hundreds of youth. (the funny thing is that several of the students in those JECHS classes  I just taught had parents who were in my youth group!)

I also spent time deciding what type of man I actually wanted to be married to someday. My list included

  • A man who loves the Lord with all his heart, soul, mind and strength
  • A man who is self-sacrificing – who you see regularly denying his own desires and putting others before himself. (not only giving of his time, talent & treasure to help his family and friends but also volunteering and serving others without getting anything in return)
  • A man who shared my priorities of faith, family, friends & ministry
  • A man who shared my values – pro-life with a heart & passion for the unborn, liberty, service, patriotic, the Bible as the inerrant word of God, importance of corporate worship & fellowship with believers, God is in control of my life, my things, my money and my future, children being raised by their parents not by paid personnel
  • A man who shared my purpose – to minister together to young people and make a profound difference in their lives
  • A man who likes babies and views children as a blessing from God 
  • A man who respects his Mom & treats her with kindness
  • A man who was kind, compassionate, patient, faithful and committed
  • A man who was my very best friend with shared interests and enjoyment of just being together

As a result of making this “list” I also was convicted to become a woman that a man of this caliber would desire to marry.  That was a bit more challenging than making the list.

A bonus to this “season of singleness” was being able to avoid the pointless dating, relationship & break up cycle that often results in a broken & damaged heart and physical impurity.  I see too many young people who are hurt by dating and relationships and carry the scars with them for a very long time.  I have to believe that God has a better way for them to live & learn.

I shared how this “no dating” decision was met with disdain & ridicule by some friends, family members & even other believers.  I was considered “strange” or “out there” by many.  But I held my ground, despite others opinions, knowing that the Lord clearly led me to make this commitment.

That season lasted a short four years  and was an incredible and awesome time in my life that I will always cherish!

And the rest of the story? How did I go from not dating to a married woman?  Well, this is the wonderful love story that God orchestrated just for me!  It was in the fall of 1985 when God began to move in my heart and do a new thing in my life.  Little did I know however that the man He would ultimately lead me to commit my heart & life to was a part of my life during the entire time I was in that “season of singleness.”

I had met Dan Lambdin as a freshman at the University of the Pacific.  His sister, Jennae was one of my dorm mates and since my own family had moved 3000 miles away from California to Virginia, she invited me to join with her family for many occasions.  Dan was not a Christian at that time and if someone had told me that one day he would be my husband I would have, well let’s just say, I would have laughed.  He was certainly nice enough but his morals and lifestyle were starkly different than my own and spiritually we were miles apart. He was simply and only…my good friend’s brother.  He came to know the Lord Jesus the following Spring and over the next few years we developed a casual friendship.

After college I became the youth pastor at a local church and very quickly realized that as a single young woman,  I needed HELP from a few good men!  I asked several of my brothers in Christ, including Dan, to volunteer with the youth & disciple the young men.  During that next year Dan & I became close friends as we ministered together.  I grew to admire and respect his strong faith as well as his incredible ability to influence the teens in the youth group. We, along with the entire youth staff spent much time together praying, ministering & fellowshiping. During this time there were several men of God all around me and many friends who desired to play matchmaker, yet I was determined to keep my eyes fixed on the Lord & do His work until He showed me the man I would marry.

One weekend Dan’s mother called & asked me to come listen to her share at a Bible study at her church. Over the years we had become close so of course I agreed to come & listen along with a dear friend.  At the meeting, Dan stood up to introduce his Mom & pray.  I can not explain to you in the natural the feeling that came over me.  It was as if a veil had been lifted from my eyes & I was seeing this man for the first time.  I felt the Lord impressing on me that his would be the man I would someday marry.

I left the meeting a bit shaken and wondering if I really had heard the Lord correctly.  I asked that God would confirm it through His written Word & in prayer.  I also knew that if this was really God that He would speak to Dan heart & that I was not to say a word.  I was not to be the “pursuer” in the relationship (oh if only women could stop doing the pursuing because we so desire to be valuable enough to be pursued).

 For the next several months I prayed consistently for God’s will to be done.  Unbeknownst to me at the time, Dan was seriously seeking the Lord for direction in his life.  He spent a week up at Springs of Living Water Christian Conference Center praying & seeking God.  During that time he decided to quit his job and pursue full-time ministry.  During that week the Lord also began to impress upon his heart that he may pursue a relationship with me.  He too took that to prayer.

Several months later in February of 1986 after we had driven together to the Springs of Living Water to pick up some of the youth group from counseling at winter camp, Dan decided to open the door to pursuing a relationship.  As I was getting ready to go home that evening he took my hand looked intently into my eyes and said with a twinkle in his eyes – “Perhaps you need to pray about if the Lord really wants you to marry someone with blonde hair & blue eyes”.  (Let me explain….over the years I had shared often with the youth group, which Dan was a leader in, my list of  godly characteristics I would look for in a husband…ok so really 99% of them were NOT physical attributes but I did often throw in – “and I’d love it if he had blonde hair & blue eyes”) I knew when Dan said that he was opening up the way for conversation to begin about where this friendship may be headed.  With my heart pounding, I blushed profusely, told him I had already been praying & quickly left….a bit amazed and very nervous at the events taking place before my very eyes. 

We did spend the next month in prayer seeking Gods will & confirmation.  Believing that the Lord often uses parents wisdom to lead & direct our lives, Dan called my father during that time to ask his blessing to marry me. My Dad said yes.

On March 18, 1986 at the end of our weekly youth service at church Dan stood up, took the microphone & said he had something to say.  At that moment one of the girls walked out & handed him a bouquet of red roses as I began to turn white realizing what he was about to do.  He told the youth group that he had a question to ask them – “I would like permission to marry your youth pastor”.  The room erupted in cheers, screams, clapping & jumping over chairs as he turned to me, got on his knees, opened a box with a beautiful diamond ring and asked – “Beth, will you marry me?”  I was a bit stunned but managed to say yes throughout all the chaos going on around me.  After the evening came to an end and Dan left to drive some students home, I sat alone in he darkened sanctuary singing songs of praise & worship to the Lord and thanking Him for His awesome plan for my life and for answering my prayers.

We went on our first official date two days later at a romantic candlelit restaurant and thus began a nine month courtship where our six years of friendship and our new found passion would grow & develop into a deep and committed love.  On December 20, 1986 we vowed before God & man to be committed to one another until death will someday part us.  It was truly “sealed with a kiss” (our first kiss….but that is another story for another day) We have now been married over 23 years and Dan is truly everything I could have ever hoped and prayed for (and some!) – the love of my life, my best friend and partner in everything! God is the perfect matchmaker!

I pray that my personal story will not only impact and perhaps challenge the student’s who hear it every year at JECHS and anyone who stumbles across this post to think differently about how they view dating & relationships and perhaps begin to seek God for His perfect plan for their lives.  May it cause you to think or re-think, question, be challenged, consider other possibilities, pray or even perhaps change your “dating & relationship” philosophy.  With the divorce rate standing at 50% in the USA…what do you have to lose? Perhaps it is time to change the way we do things around here.

We are raising our children to:

  • embrace a season of singleness in their lives and use that time to become the person God wants them to be
  • pray for & establish a standard for what they want in their future spouse
  • save their hearts, souls and bodies to give fully & purely to their marriage partner (without giving it away to others along life’s journey)
  • wait on the Lord for Him to match them with the perfect person at the perfect time

7 Comments

Filed under Courtship, Faith, Life Lessons, Marriage

March 30, 2010 · 1:47 am

Longing for My Home

Well I have been home from my annual beach holiday for over a week now and I can’t stop wishing I was still there!  It doesn’t help that every time we pulled up into our driveway last week, my 2-year-old boy would yell out – “Not this house Mama…our beach house!”  I feel your pain lil’ guy!

Now don’t get me wrong I love my home.  I really do.  It is cozy & comfortable. I specifically love:

  • the big (by California standards) back yard
  • the 15 foot wide sliding glass door that lets in so much light
  • the location of the dining area that allows us to add extra tables and seat 16-18 people together for a meal
  • our remodeled (thanks to State Farm “being there” for us) kitchen
  • our extended family/school/office room (that has a very special place in my heart as it was expanded through the efforts of many friends & family giving of their time, talent & treasure, every time I walk in that room I feel loved & cherished)  

I love the location of our home right in the middle of town close to everything and I love Stockton (yes, that is right I do love this city….if you missed that post you can read it here) Not too mention, we have a lifetime of precious memories, hundreds of treasured friends and a school ministry here that bring us all great joy. I really do love my home and where I live!

And yet….I long to be at the beach!

The beach is amazing, miraculous & wonderous! 

The beach sunsets are divine!

The beach house is spectacular!

 My bed where I get to fall asleep listening to the ocean waves, watch the sun rise over Monterey Bay, sleep in whenever I wish and at times even stay in bed on a rainy day

 The beautiful view from my bed

 the view from the living room..it is almost like you are on the shore

 the porch where I enjoy my morning coffee, many a lunch and watch the sunsets each evening

 even cleaning the kitchen is a joy when you can look out at the ocean while you are doing it!

I love everything about being at the beach – the rhythm and roar of the ocean waves, the smell of the salt air, the soft sand between my toes,  the vast expanse of blue skies during the day & brilliant stars at night, Capitola Village, the Boardwalk, Bloomsbury Tea House, the many fine resteraunts especially The Crows Nest & Bittersweet Bistro and the salt water taffy.  I love it all!  But even more than the actual location.  I love who I am and what I do when I am at the beach for what I affectionately call my…”Beach Holiday” (for the past 8 years I have been able to have an extensive amount of time at a beach house rental on the California coast….and lest anyone think that we are wealthy or own a beach house let me share that this “holiday” rental has been 100% financed through my home based scrapbooking venture)

For a month I am away from it all….the daily grind of appointments, car pools, athletic events, school activities, classes, work, phone calls, messages, junk mail and more. I even take time away from making dinner (although I do cook for pleasure at the beach) and doing chores.  I rarely get in the car and some days I stay in my jammies all day long. There is no schedule, no agenda and no pressure.  It is my personal “heaven on earth”.

  • I take long walks on the seashore most every day

  • I whisper my love to my children & soak in their physical presence

  • I play games – Hearts, Mexican Train Dominos and Nerts (and I win! Had to say that girls)

  • I pray and worship the Lord
  • I enjoy relaxing with a cup of tea while reading for pleasure

  • I drink in the nightly sunsets and marvel at God’s glory

  • I hang out on the beach…digging holes, making sand castles, laying in the sun, playing ball with my kids

  • I watch good movies, read interesting articles on the computer, check out magazines and I scrapbook
  • I dance and sing loudly and act silly with my kids!

  • I savor my coffee and enjoy fabulous foods. I eat lots of ice cream!

  • I take bubble baths, get foot massages and put on facial treatments
  • I write love letters to my darling husband and count the days down until he arrives for our romantic weekends together

  • I stay up as late as I want, sleep in & take naps
  • I celebrate! Valentines Day, Birthdays & the anniversary of our engagement

  • I nurture relationships with family & friends
  • I reflect, think, dream & write
  • I stop doing and just “be”. I breathe. I relax. I enjoy.

Even as I write this blog entry and look over the hundreds of photos, that barely capture the essence of this beach holiday, I begin to wish I was back there. I feel such a longing in my heart to return to my personal paradise.

This weekend as I was running into friends that I have not seen in a month they each asked me how the beach had been and several wondered if I was glad to be back home.  I thought about that question and answered honestly that while I love being home….life here cannot compare to the beach holiday . As I spoke those words that still small voice of the Holy Spirit whispered in my ear…”That, Beth,  is how you should feel about heaven”. 

Wow!  What a revelation to me. I have always said that when it is my time to go, I am ready to meet the Lord and spend eternity in heaven, but I have never really longed for it. (ok maybe on some particularly hard days of sickness, troubles or excessive financial stress I have longed for it but not regularly) I have been quite content with my life here on earth. It is a good life and I do love it. If I am completely honest I thought of heaven as simply a “bonus” after living & loving here on earth. I believed that it would be awesome and wonderful but I didn’t long for it, hope for it and look forward to it the way I do with the Beach Holiday. Until now…

If God can make a creation like the one we live in that is “fallen” and scarred by sin…how much more will heaven be amazing, miraculous, beautiful,wonderous, spectacular & divine. 

  •  The beach I love so dearly will have nothing on the new heaven & new earth that God has prepared for us (“Things which eye has not seen and ear has not heard, and which have not even entered the heart of man, all that God has prepared for those who love him” 1 Corinthians 2:9)
  • The multi million dollar beach home that is so much more spacious & luxurious than anything I may ever live in is nothing compared to the mansions that God has awaiting us.  (“In My Father’s house are many mansions; if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you.” John14:2 )
  • The glorious, fulfilling, joyful and fun season I have at the beach each year will not light a candle to what I can look forward to forever in eternity.  (“You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.” Psalm 64:11)
  • The rest, peace and freedom from stress I experience is just a small minute fraction of the true everlasting rest and peace I get to look forward to with the Lord.   (“Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives.” John 14:27)
  • And if you read the description of heaven in the Bible besides the promise of no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying and no more pain, it describes precious stones, pearls, cities of pure transparent gold, pure water clear as crystal, a tree of life that bears a different fruit each month and a banquet table to feast upon….and that is just the beginning.

Now that is exciting to me. That is something to look forward to and long for!

Longing for my beach holiday each year does not mean that I do not enjoy my life here with all its relationships, good times and memorable moments because I do live life to its fullest the 11 months that I am not at the beach.  However, throughout the year I do think about it, look ahead for it, get excited about it, tell others about it and get ready for it which all bring me happiness as well. Longing for heaven should be the same.

 And the greatest thing about heaven is not only will it be my “forever” Beach Holiday it will also be my home! 

If you are unsure that you have this amazing, beautiful, miraculous, wonderous, spectacuular and divine eternal life to look forward to I would love to share with you my hope of salvation through Jesus Christ.

9 Comments

Filed under Attitude, Faith, Inspiration, Life Lessons

January 15, 2010 · 4:51 pm

Beth Hasn’t Changed a Bit

Last night I had the joy of meeting with a dozen of my former students from Brookside Christian High School to begin the planning of a grand multi-year reunion of alumni, students and staff who were such an important part of our lives for over a decade.  Some of them I have not seen in almost twenty years, some I am blessed to run into on occasion and others are still a part of my daily life.

Upon ending the meeting a comment was shared with me that one of the team members had exclaimed – “Beth hasn’t changed a bit!”.  With several heads nodding in agreement and an interjection of  “all she needed during that meeting was a baby on her hip!” (which if I had brought Christiana I could have provided that picture for them), I just laughed.  While I would love to think that I look exactly the same as I did in the mid nineties and I am more than willing to pretend that I have not added a few more wrinkles, some gray hair and those extra pounds, I began to contemplate that statement today.

“Beth hasn’t changed a bit”

  • When I started my teaching career in Christian education in 1986, I was a single (engaged to be married) young lady of  just 24 years old.  When I left I was a married 35 year old mother of  four daughters.  
  • During my 11 years of being a part of Brookside Christian I held multiple positions – physical education teacher, volleyball coach, student council advisor, typing instructor (shhhhh…I do not know how to type!),summer receptionist, club advisor, journalism teacher & school newspaper advisor, yearbook advisor, leadership teacher, admissions director, guidance counselor, director of student affairs and director of development.  Yes, I was pretty much involved in every area of students lives in some way. 
  • I was intensely committed to the school and passionate about making an impact on the lives of  students through mentoring, training and discipleship.
  • I loved the Lord and desired to glorify Him in everything.

 In many ways I truly “haven’t changed a bit” –

  • I am still married (and still as committed to and adoring of my love as ever) and still a Mommy of many (although to double the number and it was making many of those reunion team members feel a bit old themselves to hear that Michelle was in college and that Amy, Kristen & Rebekah were teenagers)
  • I still have more “titles” and wear more hats than perhaps a person should – Homeschool Teacher, Co-Op leader, Creative Memories Consultant, Director of Develpment for JECHS, (which of course encompasses about 5 different jobs),  Pre-marital Counselor, Speaker and Blogger (to which I have been very slacking  as of late) with grand intentions of becoming a published writer, life coach and spearheading an adoption ministry at my church.
  • I am still very committed to the ministry of Christian education and still passionate about impacting students lives (even those who are “all grown up” now)
  • And yes, I still love the Lord with all of my heart, still want to glorify my Lord in everything, still believe in absolute truth as found in God’s Inerrant Word. In these things I hope to always be steadfast, unwavering and never change.

However, my dear former students although in many ways you are correct… “Beth hasn’t changed a bit”… there are  some ways that I have changed.

  • I no longer require the standard of perfection that I did back then.  My motto now is “done is better than perfect” and while I always strive to do my best sometimes it is just good enough to get it done.  Ahhhh joy…. a recovered perfectionist!
  • I am much more patient and long suffering towards those who are not choosing to live a life that reflects the truth of what they know of God.
  • I have relinquished personal control of my life (ha! like I was ever really in control anyway). God is in control – He is my provider (not a job or pay check), my strength (I cannot do it on my own power), my counselor (my human mind and wisdom is woefully inadequate), my personal planner who schedules my days and sends many divine appointments my way (which I use to see as disturbances).
  • I have become a bit more like my dear darling Dan (one of  the benefits of being married for 23+ years)…relaxed and easy going…although my intense, driven personality will always remain at the forefront. 

Yes, I have changed as well as remaining the same. I hope that I am a better person today than I was those years ago and I hope that in another decade I will have continued to have become more Christlike in my attitudes and actions.

Reunions are always a good time of reflection on the past – both the good and the bad.  Honestly reflecting on the past often motivates us to make changes in the future. In what ways do I want to remain the same and in what ways do I want to change?

I look forward to a year of remembering and reminiscing as well as restoring and renewing past relationships as I am involved in the planning and carrying out of this reunion (not to mention my own 30 year high school reunion that will take place this year…I wonder if they think I “haven’t changed a bit”?).

5 Comments

Filed under Consistency, Economics, Life Lessons, Making a Difference

September 20, 2009 · 12:02 pm

How does your garden grow?

This summer my sweet 10 year old Grace decided she wanted to start a garden.  Being the homeschooling Mom that I am…I said,  “Great! This can be your summer science project.”  (my motto – everything in life is school!)  With that she began to research what might grow best in our backyard, purchased all the things she needed for her garden and began the hard work of weeding the area and preparing the soil for planting.

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Besides her research on the Internet, her daddy helped provide some of the labor, her sisters cheered her on with support, her Aunt Caroline gave her the wisdom of her experience (which her parents completely lacked) and even Daniel chipped in to help start her garden!

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Since we got going a little late, she began mainly with seedlings – deciding on corn, bell peppers, cantaloupe and tomatoes.  She also used seeds to grow carrots, pumpkins & watermelon.

After the initial planting she simply did two things almost everyday – watered & weeded.  Since we are blessed to live in the very fertile and very sunny Central Valley of California….God did the rest.  The garden grew! 

fab friday 074I was amazed at the growth. In fact it seemed like almost everyday there was noticable change….first in heighth and width, then in flowers blooming, then in density and before we knew it the garden was big, beautiful and bountiful! 

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It became our morning ritual to go out to the garden and marvel how much everything had grown each & everyday.  It was miraculous to us that these things that we had planted were really growing into food that we could soon enjoy.

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During this past month we were blessed with an abundant harvest of vegetables  – we enjoyed the incredible farm fresh taste, the convenience of bringing food in right from the backyard and the great satisfaction of having grown them ourselves.

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These delicious vegetables also motivated us to try out some new recipes that made this gardening experience even richer for us.  There is something about taking your homegrown creations from this —

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to this  (delectable gourmet tomato soup) that brings complete satisfaction of the body, soul & spirit –

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As a new gardener I am still in awe of the fact that we were actually able to grow our own food.  To many, this probably  sounds silly….”why of course they grew”, you may be thinking, “I mean, what did you expect?”  I am not sure that I expected it to be so easy.  Just do the right things –

  1. Prepare the soil
  2. Plant the seedlings
  3. Water & Weed

Hmmmmm…I am sure there is  life lesson in there –> just do the “right things” and you can expect good results.  That is simple right? 

Well almost.  We did have a few vegetables that we planted in other parts of our yard that did not fare as well – our watermelon, pumpkins & a few extra tomato plants. Yes, we prepped, planted, watered & weeded but the growth just did not happen like the plants in the main garden.  What was the difference? 

The amount of sun!

While these plants got some sun everyday, they were also shaded by trees and the house and did not receive full sunlight as the others did.  This resulted in not only slower & stunted growth (and even death of the watermelon plant that was in way too much shade) but a miniscule harvest and in some cases no vegetables at all.

We learned that sunlight was of utmost importance to the growth and development of our garden, no matter how diligent we were to care for the plants.  They simply needed more than what we could provide….they needed God given provision of sunlight.  Just like our lives.

We can do everything “right” and yet even with our best efforts we cannot completely grow & produce a bountiful harvest without God’s provision through His Son, Jesus Christ –

  • His amazing grace
  • His unfailing mercy
  • His unconditional & everlasting love
  • His perfect peace
  • His powerful strength

How will you grow the garden of your life?

Will you move into the SON today and bask in the grace, mercy & love of God while being renewed by His peace & empowered by His strength so that you can grow, flourish and produce a life of abundance to be enjoyed by you and all those around you? I pray that we will all live in the Son.

2 Comments

Filed under Blessings, Faith, Inspiration, Life at the Lambdins, Life Lessons

September 13, 2009 · 5:02 pm

What I am….and what I am not

I so wish that I could have been in Washington DC for the 9/12 March yesterday.  In fact just last Sunday I was looking at airline tickets and trying to figure out a way to come up with the money to fly out there. In case you are unaware of what the 9/12 March was…let me give you the 411.  The march yesterday which drew tens of thousands of people (some estimate 2 million) from all across America was a gathering of people from every walk of life, every race, every creed, every political and non political party who wanted to express their desire to see America return to 9 basic principles and 12 values. 

Here are the 9 principles:

  1.  America is good
  2. I believe in God and He is the center of my life
     “The propitious smiles of Heaven can never be expected on a nation that disregards the eternal rules of order and right which Heaven itself has ordained.” from George Washington´s first Inaugural address.
  3.   I must always try to be a more honest person than I was yesterday.
    “I hope that I shall always possess firmness and virtue enough to maintain what I consider to be the most enviable of all titles, the character of an honest man.” George Washington
  4. The family is sacred. My spouse and I are the ultimate authority, not the government.
    “It is in the love of one´s family only that heartfelt happiness is known. By a law of our nature, we cannot be happy without the endearing connections of a family.” Thomas Jefferson
  5. If you break the law you pay the penalty. Justice is blind and no one is above it.
      “I deem one of the essential principles of our government… equal and exact justice to all men of whatever state or persuasion, religious or political.” Thomas Jefferson
  6.  I have a right to life, liberty and pursuit of happiness, but there is no guarantee of equal results.
    “Everyone has a natural right to choose that vocation in life which he thinks most likely to give him comfortable subsistence.” Thomas Jefferson
  7. I work hard for what I have and I will share it with who I want to. Government cannot force me to be charitable.
     “It is not everyone who asketh that deserveth charity; all however, are worth of the inquiry or the deserving may suffer.” George Washington
  8. It is not un-American for me to disagree with authority or to share my personal opinion.
     “In a free and republican government, you cannot restrain the voice of the multitude; every man will speak as he thinks, or more properly without thinking.” George Washington
  9.  The government works for me. I do not answer to them, they answer to me.
     “I consider the people who constitute a society or a nation as the source of all authority in that nation.” Thomas Jefferson

Here are the 12 values:

  • Honesty
  • Reverence
  •  Hope
  • Thrift
  • Humility
  • Charity
  • Sincerity
  • Moderation
  • Hard Work
  • Courage
  • Personal Responsibility
  • Gratitude

And yes they were there to protest – the current healthcare reform, the increase in government spending and trillion dollar deficit, tax increases, wealth redistribution to name a few. Here is a great slide show from a blogger friend of mine was there so you can see it for yourself  –http://picasaweb.google.com/BarbarasMommyLife/912MarchOnWashingtonDC?feat=embedwebsite#

These values & principles as well as protests combined with my pro-life/anti-abortion (let me be clear with the facts of science – abortion is the killing of a baby and should not happen in any society – there is an answer to unwanted babies it is called adoption) passion is what I am (or striving to be as I certainly have not arrived in several of these areas).

 During the past several months many of our leaders and media have classified people like me who have attended marches, tea parties, town hall meetings or protests in very unbecoming and untrue way. 

I am not:

  • a Nazi  — I have never been nor will ever embrace socialism, white supremacy, anti-Semitism or fascism
  • a racist — I do not see color or race but rather as Martin Luther King hoped for, I judge people on the content of their character.  I have very close friends of most every race – African American, Filipino, Mexican, South American, Korean. Oh and did I mention I have a precious & perfect baby girl who happens to be black that we adopted here in the USA?
  • un American — I am a proud & patriotic American, raised in a third generation military family with both of my grandfathers serving in WWII (and one giving his life there).  I have voted in every election since I turned 18, proudly fly the American flag daily and participated in the celebration of our country, our national holidays and the democratic process my entire life.
  • astroturf – this new name given to those protesting who are supposedly being paid to go protest by some big organization or corporation. Ummmm…no one has paid this lady a dime, nor recruited me let alone even talked to me. And FYI…I do not watch Fox news (have only had television reception since last Thursday), have never listened to Glen Beck (although I would love to) and catch perhaps a grand total of 1 hour per week of conservative talk radio while I am in the car driving my kids to all their actvities. 
  • a homeland terrorist – I have never ever been involved in acts of violence or coercion against America or anyone for that matter and just because I am pro life, against illegal immigration, believe in state & local authority  and  am conservative I am going to be labeled a terrorist?
  • “fishy” – simply by having legitimate concerns about the current healthcare reform bill and sharing those concerns with others makes me suspicious…hmmmm.
  • a “tea bagger” – I am too classy to even respond to this base name calling by our media
  • a moron  – some refered to yesterdays demonstration as the “Million Moron March”  So now I am being called a moron.  (I was there in spirit if not in flesh) I do not claim to be the brightest individual in the world but I am not stupid (the technical definition is an adult with the mental age of 8-12) and in fact graduated in the top 12 of my high school class (albeit in the California public schools), scored a 1200 on my SAT’s and earned a college degree from UOP.

Ok, I just thought I’d clear that up for everyone..although I doubt that the people who called me those names are reading my blog!  I will be at the next march and despite my very full life (ummm….8 children, homeschooling Mom, Director of Development for JECHS, Creative Memories Consultant and trying to do something to promote adoption) I will be campaigning for new congressmen & new senators that reflect what I am.

6 Comments

Filed under Life at the Lambdins, Life Lessons, My "take", Pro-life

September 1, 2009 · 10:20 am

Celebration, Reflection & Contemplation

47 years ago today….I was born.

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My Celebration

Bops July- Aug 090Today I will celebrate my life!  My God given life – my abundantly blessed life – my 47 years on this earth – my health – my family & friends – my faith – my future!

I will celebrate with those I love and I will enjoy all the delights of the day! I will probably continue to celebrate throughout the week as well.

Yes, birthdays are a great time to celebrate life but they are also a time to reflect on the past and contemplate the future.

My Reflection

As I look back on my life, there is much for which to be thankful.   Mine is a life truly blessed.

  • I was blessed to be born to a father & mother who loved life, loved the Lord and loved each other

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  • I was blessed to be born in America – land of the free and home of the brave!
  • I had the wonderful experience of growing up with two sisters and a brother to play with, fight with, share with (no matter how unwillingly at times) and make memories together!

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  • I moved many times growing up in a military family which produced positive character qualities in my life as well as the awesome friendships that I made throughout the country
  • I had a very unique and amazing high school experience, especially my senior year and senior class.  It was stellar and stands out as a highlight of my youth

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  • As a 16 year old, I encountered the Lord in a very personal way that has clearly affected most of my important decisions since that day in 1979

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  • I had a life changing summer at Hume Lake in 1981

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  • I experienced and got to be involved in  a season of amazing revival at the University of the Pacific through Chi Alpha ministries  in the early 80’s

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  • I had the honor & joy of being the youth pastor to the most amazing group of teenagers from every high school in Stockton & Lodi for four years.

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  • After praying for six years,  I was given by God the very best man that I could ever imagine to marry and share a life together. I am still in awe of God’s gift to me.

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  • I became passionate about the ministry of Christian education during my early years at Brookside Christian . It was my time at this school that molded me, shaped me and caused me to grow immensely.  The students & staff from that era  are precious friends and will always hold a prominent place in my heart.

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  • I have been blessed by God with children.  Truly there is nothing better in this life than the gift of children.  Sometimes I stop and wonder what I did to deserve these wonderful blessings.  I look at them in awe and thankfulness….they are my life!

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  • I  was “forced” into homeschooling by our life circumstances (as I would have never decided on my own to homeschool) and this has been the single best thing for my children and our relationship.  I will never give it up now!

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  • My Creative Memories business has brought a richness to my life that is beyond anything I could have ever imagined.  I have gotten to use and improve my gifts & talents, invest in others lives, experience amazing opportunities and make life long friendships in this committed community of consultants.

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  • Jim Elliot Christian High School is a miracle and I got the opportunity to be a part of  this one of a kind school.  After 11 years this school and the people involved continue to bring me joy, love and inspiration every day! I can only hope and pray that it will never end.

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Now in my reflection of the past there are also regrets, sorrows, things I wish I could change and life lessons to be learned:

  • I regret my indiscretions and poor decisions of my youth as well as the way I often treated my mother  & older sister when I was a teenager
  • I did not fully use the intellect that I have been given to study and learn throughout my high school & college education years
  • I would offer greater grace and show more compassion to the youth who were put under my charge as a youth pastor and teacher
  • I would be more humble and vulnerable to those around me
  • My older children would not have spent anytime in daycare and I would have trusted the Lord for His provision as He always proves Himself faithful.
  • I would have been more frugal with my finances, especially during the more prosperous years
  • After years as a high school & college athlete, I would have made healthy eating & daily exercise a life long habit, instead of  a “up & down” lifestyle
  • I lost my father when I was 33 years old…I wish I could have been given more time here on this earth with him
  •  I would have lost my temper less with my children, not “sweat the small stuff”  and spent more time praying with them and teaching them the Bible as well as studying and meditating on it myself
  • I would have held my tongue and attempted to only speak words of encouragement, love and appreciation to my family

 My Contemplation

Reflecting on the past is always a good starting point for contemplating the future.  Looking at the positive & the negative of your past can help you purpose in your heart to plan a better tomorrow. 

The next time your birthday rolls around what do you want your life to look like?

What do you want to do, accomplish and change in the next 5 years, 10 years, 20 years?

What were you born to do?  What is your unique and special purpose here on this earth?

When you are at the end of your life (which when you are my age, if you have done the math,  you are aware that there are fewer years ahead of you than behind you)…what will you want your life to have looked like? What will be your legacy? What difference will you have made in the lives of your family, friends, church, workplace, city, country or world?

As I do every year around this time, I will once again be contemplating these questions and be purposeful about making needed changes in my life and making a plan to do and be all that God has for me in this life,  that He has given me.

When the final day of my life…my “deathday” arrives I want to not only be ready but I want to have lived a life that glorified God and I want to leave a legacy to future generations of Lambdin’s that will inspire them to live a purposeful life fulfilling their destiny.

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Filed under Blessings, Goals & Dreams, Life Lessons, Making a Difference

August 27, 2009 · 4:11 pm

Life Lessons Behind the Lawn Mower

This week, in the midst of getting prepped & ready for another year of homeschooling my K-8 crew, I realized that the back yard needed a bit of attention.  Ok, so maybe it needed a lot of attention.  The grass had grown to a point that it was two feet high in some areas and was nearly impossible for the toddler to play out there. (an essential aspect of homeschooling when you have little ones underfoot  is having a safe place to “shoo” them off to so you can spend some time attempting to teach in the short spurts you have available)

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I kept hoping that my dear darling hubby would get to it and of course he would have…”sooner or later” (with later being the most probable) – but as is always the case at this time of year, he is fully immersed in the beginning of school (lesson plans, chapel scheduling, school camp preparations) and he is a coach for the JV Volleyball team which keeps him gone at practices and games until dusk almost daily.

So today, I stopped “hoping” and “wishing”, accepted the fact that I am a “coaching widow” once again this fall and got up and got going on the lawn (aka: jungle).   It took me three hours!  Between the blade continually getting stuck because the grass was still a bit damp and way too long, having to empty the grass catcher with every strip of lawn mowed, running over toys that were hidden so deep that there was no way I could have found them and having to actually mow the lawn twice – first on a higher setting and then on the normal height. 

The results –

  • an overflowing  garbage can filled with just the grass cut today
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  • a very sunburned, hand blistered, sweaty, sore and tired lady
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  • a mostly yellow lawn for the next few days – since what is now showing has never seen the sun (but it is a great homeschool lesson in photosynthesis…right?)
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  • a 10 year old who got a little training in lawn mowing
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  • a newly cut lawn (although not anywhere close to my dear darling hubby’s high standard of lawn mowing, edging, trimming, raking etc… but hey it is done!)
  • a little boy who can happily play ball in the yard again
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While mowing I had lots of time for reflection (after all there is not much else you can do while mowing the lawn except think).  I began wondering why we let the backyard lawn get to this point.  We certainly never allow our front yard to be knee high in length with weeds growing wild.  Although on occasion the front yard may be a little overdue for mowing, it never comes close to looking like a cross between a jungle and an abandoned field.  Why is this? It didn’t take long for me to come up for many reasons:

  • We would not want to suffer the embarrassment (shame?) of having others see our unkempt yard
  • We would not want others to “talk about” us or think badly of us
  • We would not want our neighbors to be unhappy or frustrated or wish we would move
  • We would not want to get fined (even though our home owners association would require it to get really really bad and give us several warnings before they fined us)

Thus the front yard is regularly mowed and maintained while the backyard at times is left alone to become ugly and unusable. Isn’t that often times just like our own lives?  We  want to “look good” on the outside where others can see and yet in the “backyard” of our hearts we are letting things get out of control and wild.

Truly everything we do to mess up our lives, hurt others or sin against God….begins in our hearts & minds.  Before we ever perform an action that destroys ourselves or our relationship with others or God…we have thought about doing it and instead of regularly maintaining our thought life and our heart attitudes we spend most of our time trying to look good to others.  Whether it is looking good by ….

  • obtaining “things” like houses, cars or other “toys”
  • having the right physical shape and wearing chic styles
  • going to the top college, obtaining degrees or having a great job
  • being in a position of influence, power and authority
  • having perfectly dressed children who are involved in all the latest and greatest activities or sports
  • going to church every Sunday
  • volunteering your time and giving your money to charity
  • and the list goes on….

Now just like having and taking care of your “front yard” – these pursuits and accomplishments are not bad in themselves but if the “backyard” -our hearts and minds  – are filled with thoughts and attitudes that are “ugly” (bad, wrong, sinful, evil)  then what have we really gained?  We may have fooled everyone around us with our fabulous outward appearance but we cannot fool God.

“For God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”   1 Samuel 16:7

We may “have it all” or at least attempt to “have it all”  in this life….but will we lose out in the end?

“For what does it profit a man to gain the whole world, and forfeit his soul ?”  Mark 8:36

While we may be able to look good on the outside, God knows our hearts and in the end we will answer to Him.  We need to spend time maintaining our hearts and minds with regular care. We can do this by bringing them under the control of God through prayer, confession, reading and obeying the Word.  And it would probably help if we regularly let others into the “backyard” of our hearts and minds as a motivation and accountability to keep things under control.

Let me begin by being vulnerable myself and  invite you into my backyard today and share with you some of my heart attitudes and thoughts that I need to get under control –

  • impatience
  • pride
  • coveting
  • gluttony

These are all things that I need to confess and give over to the Lord as well as turning from by practicing patience, humility, contentedness and self control.

Perhaps we all might spend a little bit more time working in  and concentrating on developing the backyard in our lives.  The benefits would truly be life changing and eternal.

Wow….who knew how cathartic mowing the lawn could be?

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Filed under Life at the Lambdins, Life Lessons